New Life of Sin

8. Our Dream

Angel dust

I frown as Tracy holds the spoon up to my mouth. “Anthony, this will be good for you, let Tracy help you.” Albert begs, giving me a soft smile. “Hell no, keep trying all you want but I ain’t takin’ that medicine.” I growl, covering myself up with the blanket.

“This is what you get for going out in the rain without a coat or umbrella. Now take the medicine before I shove it up your ass.” Tracy demands receiving a light slap to the arm from Albert. “I can’t do this anymore, I’m going to go check on the soup.” Tracy yells as she storms out of the room.

I look away as Albert sighs. “Did you learn your lesson?” He asks, hesitantly placing a hand on my back. “Lesson my fuckin’ ass you’re not my mama so quit acting like it.” I scoff, turning away from him.

“No, I’m not but I’m Tracys papa and her mama is sick so I’m going to be sticking around for a while.” He laughs awkwardly. Tears well in my eyes as snot keeps building up, making me really uncomfortable.

“Anthony, while you may not like the medicine, you’ve been dead for a long time now. We don’t know if you’re immune to something as simple as influenza. I don’t want you dying again the same way my mother did.” He whispers, his voice sounding hurt.

It was only then that I remembered how Mrs. Blanc passed, something as simple as the flu. No amount of medicine helped her and she died at the age of 40 when Albert was only 20 years old. I remember how hard he cried next to her on her deathbed.

It was one of the first times I'd ever seen him cry.

It was hard on me, but for him. It’s like the moment she died a part of him died with her. Something in him snapped and that’s when he started killing people. I only found out because I accidentally walked in on him dismembering someone.

Something about his face, covered in blood, the same wide grin he wears today. It was so addicting, so mesmerizing. I like to think that was the second time I realized I had fallen in love with him.

And there was no escaping it.

I don’t think I’ll ever admit this to anyone, it already took me a while to admit it to myself but for some reason the stupidest part of me still loves him. Even after all the hurt and arguments we've been through I can’t let him go.

“Anthony?” The sound of his voice snaps me back to reality. It’s only now I realized I had been crying this entire time. “I apologize if I said something to upset you, that wasn’t my intention. I just want to make sure you’re alright.”

I lay there, not knowing what to say. “I think I’ll take my leave now, I trust Tracy can take care of you. I will be back to check in on you two in a few days.” He sighs. The bed rising a little, indicating that he got up.

I quickly turn around, reaching a hand out and grabbing his wrist. “Please don’t leave.” I beg, tears running down my cheeks. He looks down at me, eyes wide before his gaze softens and he sits next to me again.

I don’t say anything, just cry into his sleeve, not being able to build up the strength to say what I want to. “It’s alright Anthony if you want me to stay then I’ll gladly stay.” He laughs, patting my head. “Shut up you fuckin’ asshole.” I laugh through tears.

He doesn’t say anything, just hands me a tissue with a soft, genuine smile on his face. I smile at him as I wipe the tears and snot from my face. “Relax Anthony, you won’t get any better if you push yourself right now.”

Alastor

He lays his head on my chest as I run my fingers through his hair. It’s been a long time since I’ve held him like this.

I’ve missed it.

I knew I did, I just didn’t realize how much. The feeling of his warm breath on my chest as I hold him so close to me not wanting to let go. I know this might just be a one time thing but I’m ok with it. If this is what he wants I have no complaints.

A part of me wishes it wasn’t though. That I could show him how truly sorry I am for all the hurt I put him through. That I never truly felt a thing for Lucifer and I only ever thought of him. I doubt he’ll ever want to hear it though and I don’t blame him.

At some point I snap back to reality, I don’t know how much time has passed but Anthony was now sleeping on my chest. I look down at him sleeping peacefully debating whether or not I should get up now.

My breathing hitches and the bedroom door swings open and Tracy walks in, bowl of soup in hand. She stands there wide eyed at our closeness. I smile nervously, sweat running down my forehead as she smirks.

“Someones in love~” She teases, handing me the soup. “That I won’t deny Tracy, can’t say the same about your mama though.” I laugh, gladly accepting the soup. “He is literally on top of you right now there is no convincing me he isn’t completely in love.”

“Please Tracy don’t give me false hope. I know you want us together but your mama doesn’t.” I sigh looking down at him and moving a bit of hair from his face. “Can you just let me dream? Please?” Tracy begs, giving me her puppy eyes.

“Dream all you like my dear.” I laugh. “I just wish you two would..y’know.” She whispers hesitantly. “Oh please do finish that sentence.” I raise an eyebrow at her. “I just..I dunno I guess growing up I always wanted you to be here instead of Tomas.” I sigh, closing my eyes and resting my head against the headboard.

“I wanted that too Tracy, I may not have realized but having you was the best thing to happen to me. I’m sure Tomas was amazing to you mama though, a whole lot better than me. Just be there for your mama right now ok? He’s going through a rough time right now.”

She frowns, looking down at the ground. “Tracy.” I say sternly. “Ok fine but not because you said so.” She laughs, stepping out of the room as I pull Anthony closer to me, resting my head on his.

A/N

They're in love they just don't realize it. Love ya <3