Guarded: The Alternate Path of Dean Winchester

Chapter 12: something wicked this way comes

I woke in the morning to pure exhaustion. Waking through the night in fitful dreams. To say I was simpled worried about going off to college tomorrow was an understatement. It was the evening of my twentieth birthday and all I could think about was my college checklist. All my boxes were packed and I was just down to the essentials for the road trip. Sam would be here in the morning to pick me up. Dean said he had some business to take care of but I knew better. The only business he had was avoiding me like the plague. I sighed as I decended the stairs to the kitchen. Time to eat before heading back up to prepare for the big day tomorrow.

I spied Dean drinking coffee at the breakfast nook and wanted so badly to say something, anything. I knew he'd be in town keeping me safe through college but I felt like I was losing him. We made eye contact as he shoveled sausage in his mouth. I awkwardly looked away and headed back upstairs with some toast and a glass of juice. I spent much of the day packing and accidentally fell asleep late in the afternoon. I awoke with a start just after midnight. Dean stood at my door. Cupcake in hand. "I thought I better give this to you now. We may not see each other tomorrow." He stated and smiled softly at me. I sat up and took my cupcake. Dean said he would be up awhile longer packing up a few remaining belongings in his room. "Shout if you need anything!" He called back as he walked away.

I finished off my cupcake and sat staring absent-mindly at the wall for the next 20 minutes. I probably won't see him in the morning. Maybe now is the perfect time to finally talk. I wanna make sure we are good before I leave in the morning. I headed gingerly to Dean's bedroom door and it was already open. Dean looked up from his bed with a strained smile on his lips, near empty whiskey glass in hand. He looked almost.. sad? I sat down next to him cautiously. He seemed weary but made no move to get away from me. I sat, twittling my thumbs in the awkward silence.

"Dean?" I asked meekly. He downed the remaining whiskey and turned to look at me. "Yeah?" I gulped, not knowing where to begin and suddenly emotional. "Hey, are you okay?" He asked as he leaned in. "I just.. I feel like I'm losing you." "Andy.." "You have been the only constant in my life for the past 7 years. I just.. I can't lose you Dean." Tears spilled out of my eyes and Dean immediately pulled me to his side. He kissed my hair and rubbed my shoulder. This man has been my rock for almost half my life. We just have to be okay. I turned to face him. The look in his eyes was so reassuring. Was it love? Could he love me too? I breathed in his scent and my senses awakened. Tonight in this moment, I needed to know for sure. Did he need me too?

In one swift motion I brought myself to my knees and straddled his lap. My legs spread around him, exposing the innermost parts of my thighs. Dean groaned and gripped me firmly by the hips. As we locked eyes in silence I wondered.. Will this finally be the moment I've been waiting for?