Sweet Revenge

Artwork and the Burrow

          "Oh, yes," Draco breathed as he sprinkled a sort of powder on his artwork. His face was level with the counter-top, and his eyebrows were doing acrobatics as each particle of powder landed. "Ooh, yesss," he said, a little quieter than the first time for maximum effect. 

          "What are you doing?" a voice from the doorway sounded.

Draco squawked, jumping away from his delicate work of art.

          "And..what is that?" the voice continued, taking on a more bemused air. 

           "I call it...The Un-Duck Duck," Draco revealed. 

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          "Draco has taken up a new hobby," Lucius groaned. 

He rubbed his temples, and Rodolphus patted his back comfortingly. 

          "I'm sure it's extraordinary," Rodolphus intoned.

          "No! It's...it's just so bizarre!"

           "Well--"

          "And he wants me to sell it in a Persian bazaar!"

Rodolphus stopped patting Lucius's back. 

          "Why a Persian bazaar?"

          "Because he thinks it fits with the aura of his art. And also because he thinks he can get a lot of money from the sales, which he's going to invest toward acquiring a Ramora."

          "...A Ramora?"

          "Yes! You know? That rare marine creature found only in the Indian Ocean!"

          "Well...I've got a Ramora."

          "...What."

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On the other side of Slytherin Castle, Harry was sitting in his private parlour with Bob, painting a frankly exquisite portrait of the albino peacock (who was very pleased to be a model) against the white walls. 

One room away, Tom made plans to raid the Burrow. He wanted as much to be cleared up in one strike as he could, so he had sent Sirius to ask Walburga to ask Phineas Nigellus to ask Dilys Derwent (Headmaster of Hogwarts 1741-1768 and one of the few portraits Dumbledore still trusted) if and when Dumbledore would be stopping by the Burrow. Then, he had sent Selwyn to ask Tonks (who had successfully been convinced to be Neutral) to ask Elphias Dodge to ask Lily Potter when Alex Potter would be at the Burrow. 

Everything was coming along marvelously. The only problem was that this long game of telephone was taking an awfully long time to get back to him, so instead, Tom was sitting in his study, trying to deduce whether his quill feather was from a falcon or a pheasant. 

Before him, on the table, was a lovely sketch of the Burrow (curtesy of Snape) and a not-so-lovely blueprint of it (curtesy of Bellatrix, who, Tom had discovered, possessed rather unfortunate drawing skills). Tom just didn't understand it, so naturally, he'd given up. 

He'd send some sad Death Eater to try to decipher it later.  

Of course, that Death Eater would only know that although the Dark Lord had already brilliantly deciphered everything in the blueprint, he was magnanimously giving his followers the opportunity to enhance their knowledge through this little homework assignment. 

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The Burrow was a very precarious structure. Its first story actually looked like a normal Muggle house with a red-tiled roof, but then, the rest of the stories looked like someone had decided it was a wonderful idea to build a treehouse on top of a house and support it with only a few wooden beams. The Burrow was quite literally three separate houses balanced on top of each other at different angles (it was a wonder the teetering thing didn't fall over every time there was a wind storm). While some (Arther Weasley, most notably) would call it an architectural marvel, Tom personally believed it was a disaster waiting to happen. 

The poor Death Eater he had chosen to unknowingly suffer through reading Bellatrix's blueprint (at least she tried) was, in the end, forced to go to Bellatrix herself and ask her what it all meant. She had thrown a big fit when that poor Death Eater dared to suggest that perhaps Bellatrix should get drawing lessons from Snape. 

That Death Eater had stumbled into Tom's office clearly suffering from the side effects of multiple jinxes and hexes, but the blueprint had been successfully deciphered, and Tom had heard back from Sirius that Dilys Derwent had told them that Dumbledore would be at the Burrow on either Wednesday or Friday. Tom had also learned from Selwyn that Alex Potter was supposed to be there on Wednesday for some more pointless Boy-Who-Lived training. 

So, Tom had taken the only reasonable course of action and decided to attack on Wednesday. At exactly 4:21 in the morning, they would attack, and Tom would cast Protego Diabolica around the Burrow so that while his followers could go where they pleased, Alex and the rest would be trapped inside the building. Death Eaters would make two inlaid circles. The outer ring would put up anti-apparition wards and fight off any stray Order members trying to use the General Counter-Spell to combat the flames, and the inner ring would advance into the house, kidnap anyone they could, and then Floo out. While all this was happening, Outer Circle members would be sent to make the homes of all the other Order members untraceable. Bellatrix would probably be given the go-ahead to set fire to the Order's headquarters after everyone had been kidnapped, and then, the Order would only be left with the option of Hogwarts as their headquarters. Once the whole Order were stuck in one location (Hogwarts), things would be easier to manage. 

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As Tom solidified his plans, Harry finished his portrait of Bob and dropped Bob off at the Manor, where Narcissa and Lucius were taking a much-needed nap (a siesta, according to Lucius) after hosting the Rowles. 

Upon returning, he found the West Wing of Slytherin Castle to be too silent for his taste, so he went back to Malfoy Manor where Draco was trying to get his uncle Rodolphus to remember where he put the Ramora. 

          "Uncle Rodolphus! Would you like me to brew you a memory potion?"

          "They don't work for things you've forgotten you forgot!"

          "Well, I'm sure I can figure something out!"

          "I'm not trying anything you concoct!"

          "Excuse me! I've learned a great deal from Uncle Sev!"

          "See, why do you call him Uncle Sev when you call me Uncle Rodolphus? Harry calls me Uncle Rodo, right Harry?"

Draco looked singularly uncomfortable. 

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          "What, no! I can't do that, Draco!"

          "Why not? It's your artwork. Therefore, it must be publicized. What better way to publicize it than to print it and spread it around the Burrow?"

          "It'll all go up in flames!"

          "Not if the paper is loyal to our Lord."

          "How can paper have a loyalty?"

          "Everything has a loyalty."

They looked at each other.

          "Right. Well, just look in Aunt Bella's room. She should have some in there."

           "Why do you call him Uncle Rodolphus when you call his wife Aunt Bella?"

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When Harry proposed the idea of scattering portraits of an albino peacock on a white background around the site of the charred Burrow, Tom was all for it, nevermind Harry's doubts.