Chameleon - Shoto ASD fic -

16

!!!TW!!!

Suicidal/ SH ideation

CHAPTER 16

I've nearly finished unpacking my stuff into the prison like room, so it's less intimidating. Shinso and Eri are helping. Well, Shinso is helping, Eri is just playing with everything I have.

'What's this?' She asks, holding up a jacobs ladder. I hold it up, showing it cascade down. 'Cool!' She says, playing with it. Shinso looks at it. 'Why do you have it?' 

'Well firstly it's great fun to play with. And secondly, Tou-Dabi gave it to me when we were kids'. Shinso looks at me, his face furrowing into an expression I don't understand.

'I see' He says. Eri puts the jacobs ladder down on the bed, and picks up a picture. 'Awh, you guys look so happy! ' She says. It's a picture of all of us as kids, playing on the beach. I smile.

I hear the front door open and close. Eri runs out the room 'Dad, Papa! You're back!' Shinso and I follow her. 

'So?' Shinso asks, as Mic and Aizawa begin to take off their shoes. 'Yeah, he signed full custody over to Zash and I' Aizawa says, beaming.

Mic scoffs. 'Yeah, not after calling us some lovely homophobic slurs first though!' He says. Aizawa chuckles. 'They were pretty tame compared to my dad's if I'm honest. I give them...a three out of ten'. Everyone laughs, including Eri.

'Let's go out to dinner, to celebrate!' Mic says, grabbing Eri off the floor, pulling her into a tight squeeze. 'Nice idea!' Aizawa says. 'Where'd you wanna go Todor-erm, I mean-'

'It's okay. Please call me Sho'. I smile. He returns the smile. 'That's going to get confusing!' Says Hizashi. 'We got two Shos now!' Eri laughs. 'Double Sho!' She squeals with delight. Aizawa rolls his eyes.

'So Sho, where do you want to go for dinner?' I think. 'Somewhere with Soba' I say. 'Didn't you have Soba earlier?!' Shinso says. 'Yep. If I like something I will eat it over and over again'.

'Okay, Soba it is!' Hizashi says.

-later-

I'm lying awake in bed. Dinner was fun, I really enjoyed their company.

But you're not really part of their family.

Was wondering when you were going to turn up. I sigh.

You need to hurt yourself for being a burden to them.

How? I'm literally in a room with nothing.

Kitchen drawer.

I sneak out the room, trying my best to remain quiet. SQUEAAAK! Damn it. I guess I don't know the house as well as my old one.

Shinso's room opens, revealing him stood looking at me.

'What you doing up?' He asks. 'W-water' I stutter. He laughs, rolling his eyes. 'You have a sink in your room that has filtered water. Try again'.

'Toilet?' I say again, semi asking. 'You telling me or asking me?' He says. 'Telling' I say. He laughs. 'You have a toilet in your bathroom too Shoto. Let's skip the crap'.

I huff. 'Please just go back to bed' I say. 'Nope!' He says, and he drags me into his room, pulling out a spare futon.

'You're staying here tonight' He says simply. I groan. 'Stop policing me!' I say in annoyance. 'Absolutely not'. He says. I climb into the futon. He throws me his weighted blanket.

'You sure?' I ask. 'Yeah' He says. We lie in silence for a bit.

You need to sneak out and cut yourself. You need to-

'How far have you got with Deku?' He asks out of nowhere. 'Erm, like, we went to the mall once. That's pretty far away'. I say. He burts out laughing.

'Sorry. You're literal. I mean, like romantically?' He asks. Ah. I think I get it.

'Why are you asking me that?' I say with annoyance. 'Cause, I know your brain's cooking up some fucked up shit right now and I'm trying to distract you'. He says. I see.

'We made out a couple of times you pervert. That's it.' There's a pause. 'Why, how far you got with Denki?' There's a silence. 'Who's the pervert now?' Shinso retorts.

'That's not answering my question' I say back immediately. There's another silence. He sighs. 'Well, we almost did it once, but I freaked out' he says. 

'And by did it you mean sex right?' I ask. He groans in irritation. 'Yes Shoto'. 

'Why'd you freak out?' I ask. He sighs. 'I dunno. I guess, I just don't wanna mess up, you know? Like what if I'm shit?' He asks. I think.

'I guess it's kinda like training. You get better the more you work at it. And I guess you need open and honest communication. Set boundaries and stuff'. 

'That's actually surprisingly insightful Shoto' he says. 'Thank you'. There's another silence.

'Hey Sho?' He asks. 'Yeah' I say back. 'I'm glad you're alive'. I smile. 'Thanks Shinso'.

-morning-

Shinso waves me goodbye, as he heads towards his class.

You know, if he died, he could join class 1A.

I walk into class, noticing Iida and Backugo already sat there. I give them a polite nod, then sit down at my desk. I hear footsteps, then smell caramel.

I look up, noticing Backugo is sat at the desk next to me. He thrusts out his hand, dropping a small box onto my desk. I open it, revealing some sort of earphone things.

'Thanks?' I say, questioning. He coughs awkwardly.

'I wear them when I train. So I don't go deaf'. He says matter of factly. 'Thought they could help you with ya noise overstimulation thingy'. He says. I smile.

'That's actually really thoughtful Backugo. Thank you. And, well, sorry for biting you yesterday'. 'Tch' He says, standing up. 'I had a spare pair' He slinks back to his desk. I put them in, and immediately notice the change. I can still hear things, but it's not as overwhelming. I like it.

More people begin to filter in, waving at me as they sit down. In bounds Deku, who practically launches himself at me, pulling me into a tight hug.

'Erm, hello?' I ask. 'I realise I haven't officially asked you on a date yet!' He says excitedly. He unclaps his hug. 'So?' 

'So, what?' I ask, oblivious. He rolls his eyes. 'Shoto would you like to go on a date with me?' He asks. Some of the class gasp in excitement. 'Yeah' I say, smiling.

'Great!' Some people clap; Denki whoops. 'I was thinking of going to an arcade, then I thought that would be too loud for you, then I thought about dinner, but had the same problem-'

'-You're mumbling' I say, smiling. 'Oh, sorry, right' He clears his throat. 'How about a board game cafe?' He asks nervously. 'Sounds great' I say. He smiles, visibally relaxing. 

'Don't we need more people if its board games?' I ask. I watch his face fall. 'Ah damn, I didn't think about that.' I smile at him.

'That's okay. I know somebody who might be interested in a double date' I say. He smiles again. 'Great!' he says. 'Who?' I look over to Denki. 'I'll send them a text.' Denki understands me, and smiles, nodding.

'Could everybody take your seats please' a grumpy Aizawa asks. Everybody shuffles into their seats. 'Okay class, today we're going to be continuing on from yesterday'. 

He turns to the whiteboard, as I turn and look at Deku. I'm going on a date.