To my Dearest Friend

you are stubborn

Yves montague

It's been a week since I talked about my plan with Frances. Both my parents and hers were thrilled to hear I wanted to marry. I don't think my mother thought I would ever marry, but to be honest, I didn't think I would either. My father seemed a bit hesitant at first. Prrobably because Eleanor isn't the most suitable partner for me as she does not have any title. But I am happy with the enthusiasm, as far as you call it enthusiasm. I mean at Least somebody will be happy right?

Now...the only thing I need to do is ask her. I have absolutely no idea how she will react to it. It will be very possible she will be outraged and hate me and my sister for the rest of her life. Eleanor has a mind of her own, that I know all too well.  I do not know how I am going to do this but I believe that it will all fall into place eventually.

I am walking through the hills with Eleanor. I must say I am nervous. We are standing on a hill, looking down at the manificent manor. I smile, this will all be mine in a few years. I take a deep breath and look at her, the wind is tugging on her begging her to dance with him. 'Eleanor, what would a men need to do to be worthy of your hand in marriage?' The chuckles 'You know Yves, I do not know. I really like you, you are a real gentlemen and a lady could not wish more. You'll find a beautiful wife. You're kind, beautiful, perfect and I could not wish for anything more in a man but I would not understand it if somebody like oyou or another gentleman would like me." I look her and sigh. I wonder why she is do adament that she does not deserve love, or help or anything. It's like she needs to do everything alone otherwise it doesn't count for her. It like she is determined to be stronger than she is. She will always deny that she needs anything. Why do I recognise it?

'Eleanor, Have you ever let somebody truly love you?' She doesn't respond but I see the longing and despair in her eyes. 'You would just end up hating me too.' she says while her voice breaks, I smile a kind smile and put a tuft of hair behind her ear. 'Why would I?' 'I'd be too difficult, too much work.' I laugh, does she really think that would make a difference? If somebody loves you the would want to take care of you, however difficult you may be. It's love and it's strange, but beautiful. Frances would do anything for Eleanor, I know that because Eleanor is her rain, her Cyril, she is her whole world. She it the thing I have lost. They need the life I once wished for myself. 'I like that about you Eleanor' She walks down the hill, I follow her and try to stay in front of her.

'Would you do anything to make me as comfortable as possible' 'Of course!' I respond. God why does she walk so fast. 'What about jewelery? Would you buy the most expensive rings I could want?' I chuckle and grab the ring from my pocket. 'You know when imagined this it was more calm and less like we were fighting.' I open the case revealing a beautiful engagement ring. 'If I would ask....would you say yes?' She stammers for a moment before asking what her father said. 'Both your parents were very enthusiastic. They would like you to marry me.' she shakes her head and looks at the ground, I grab her chin and lift it so she looks me in the eye. I recognise her eyes, but I do not remember from where 'I only have one question.....Do you really love my sister?' I ask with a soft voice. I need to be sure she won't break my dear Frances heart I need to protect her at all cost. She looks at me with fear in her eyes. A sif I want to tell the world. Doesn't she get it yet?

'Look at me eleanor!' She looks into my eyes, her green eyes are indeed beautiful but they don't compare to the ones I am used to loving. They cotain hatred and devastation 'I don't understand what you mean' She says clearly feigning anger. She turns around and wants to walk away but I grab her arm, she yanks it out of my grip 'Don't Touch me!' 'Eleanor, I am sorry, I did not mean  to upset you! Eleanor Wait up!' she begins to run. I did not think it would go like this I bite my lip perhaps I should've be ween a little bit more considerate. 'Eleanor wait!' she turns around. The wind is tugging on my clothes and hair as I stand there desperate to to deliver my sister with a better than life than I had. I feel a singular tear run down my cheek.

'Yves, Why do you need to stick your nose into th things that do not cocern you? Sometimes it is better not to know some things about people.' 'Eleanor think about it. Frances could love you. I don't have to love you and you don't have to love me.' I say desperately. Please make my sister happy eleanor I am begging you. 'That is not my point dear Yves.' She walks up to me and puts her hand on my cheek. 'You are fully prepared to marry a women you know will never love you. Yves, that is incredibly tragic. Look at you, you could get everyone in the world to love you and you choose the one who has nothing to offer. You choose the one whom you know will never love you, not like that. I have no idea how little you must think of yourself to sentence yourself to this loneliness. I do not understand.' I feel tears streaming down my cheeks. I know she is not wrong, and that hurts even more. But this is my only way to flee from societies rules. The rules I have cursed for years.

 She turns around and wants to leave when I find my voice, I know why I do this. 'My sister deserves, so much Eleanor, so much more than I would ever deserve. You two deserve something together Eleanor, and I am aware that I will be lonely but it will be beautiful loneliness. Can't you simply thank me for that?' I ask with a broken voice where all hope is drained from. 'I just do not understand why you need to sacrifice yourself for that Yves.' I smile 'Don't you think it is better to break my heart knowingly in a mutual agreement than breaking a young men's heart eleanor. think about it eleanor, dear eleanor, stubborn eleanor.' She looks at me as it starts to rain. The cold rain is covering our hair in these tears of heaven. She takes a deep breath, 'You know Yves, you are strange. That is certain.' I smille 'So will you think about it?' I ask.

She smiles 'May I see the ring again?' I chuckle and show her the ring again. she looks at it for a little while. 'You know what, I will marry you Yves montague. But only for your beautiful sister.' I smile and hug her as we get soaked by the rain. 'You have no idea how much joy that gives me.' I say but she has no idea that if I would be completely honest somewhere deep inside my heart breaks again.