Late Night Thoughts

Words from an Anxious Nerd

The days of waiting patiently are over
It's too tiring the giving and receiving nothing but a cold shoulder
Now it's time to fight, and to fight unrelenting
Find the reason I'm here and achieve everything I'm attempting
A week from now, I'll know my true path
Don't worry about the fears, everything is just math
Like a Newman projection, I'm finding new conformations
Fighting the steric hindrance, I'll try every rotation
Like a Resonance structure, I'm finding a new balance
Bonding at every opportunity and gripping tight with newly sharpened talons
I'm just an emulsion trying to salt out the impurities
I'll recrystallize every failure, until all I know is victory
I'm in my transition phase, but soon I'll find stability
I'm tired of the fight but I've got so much left to do
The reward will be more work but with that other's can pursue
Their own lives and dreams and health
Without the work, we're both caged animals
I hate it and I love it call me an anion free radical
I'm attacking every issue like a nucleophilic mechanism
Utilizing every ounce of energy for this scientific escapism
But at times I wonder, is it all really worth it?
Should I give up my spot to someone who better deserves it?
Should it be this hard to expand my mind with every new molecular rule
Or is this just a hurdle to be a tool?
Doing the work that God intended me to do to make up for everything I've mistaken?
Is it really my decision, if I quit, would I be forsaken?
This can't be my maximum, I've always been on minimum
Mindlessly going through the motions while my mind is on my own problems
I can't fail if I don't try, but I'll stay where I am
So I have to move forward, this is the only plan
So I'll keep pushing until my tires are out of tread
Swerving down this highway, in my eyes I only see red
Burning through everything like an acid until I finally find my base