Sound of Winter || Taegyu

Chapter Thirty Four

Beomgyu sighs, leaning his pounding head against the pillow, closing his eyes when he hears the front door of the hotel close. It's loud, and even though he knows Taehyun didn't intentionally mean to slam it, it still makes him frown, burying his head deeper into the pillow. He doesn't know how to talk to Taehyun right now, he can't even look at him without wanting to break down crying and it sucks. He wants to hug Taehyun, to be told that everything's going to be okay and that all of this will pass in time, but the mere mention of his name makes bile rise in Beomgyu's throat.

He pulls the thin white sheet over his head, pulling his knees closer to his chest. The silence suffocates him like a blanket, memories from his dreams flooding his mind once more. He wraps his arms around his knees, trying to hold himself together as tears threaten to trickle down his cheeks, but he refuses to let himself cry.

This trip is supposed to be fun, and he's supposed to be better now. He can't spend the entire trip crying and ruining it for everyone else. He presses the soft material of his hoodie, that he most definitely did not steal from Taehyun's bag last night, against his eyes, effectively stopping his tears.

The sound of a keycard swiping at the front door startles him, and he quickly moves up in the bed, his back hitting the headboard behind him. The door creaks open and he lets out a sigh when he sees Soobin walk in, shrugging off his jacket before folding it in half and throwing it on top of the dresser. A few pieces of snow melt, turning into water before rolling off the jacket and hitting the ground, leaving tiny circular patterns on the floor.

"Hey, Gyu," Soobin hums, running a hand through his hair, shaking the remaining bits of snow out before shooting him a smile. Soobin has always been so kind to him, so patient with him for the past months, and it only makes him feel worse for how he reacted earlier. He doesn't want to be this way, to be a bother to every person that he cares about, but he can't help it. "Figured I would stay behind with you, keep you company and whatnot."

"Taehyun set you up to it, didn't he?" Beomgyu accuses, frowning. He knows Taehyun, and he knows that he would never leave Beomgyu alone, not in a million years. If something happened and Taehyun was unable to be there, Soobin would be the first person he sent.

"He did," Soobin sighs, pulling his phone out of his pocket and setting it down on the dresser by the television.

Soobin exhales heavily through his nose, pressing his lips together. It's pointless for Soobin to lie; Beomgyu already knows that it's true. Beomgyu fiddles with the end of the blanket, folding it over and smoothing out the edges in his lap. It's a small motion, but one that provides him with a small amount of comfort.

The bed beside him dips, Soobin's body weighing down the side of the bed as he sits on the edge, staring at Beomgyu intently. He reaches over and grabs Beomgyu's shaky hands in his own, they're warm, much like how Taehyun's are, but not nearly as soft, and they don't feel as comforting as Taehyun's do, either. Soobin gives Beomgyu's hands a gentle squeeze.

"I know that I'm not Taehyun, but I'm here for you, okay, Gyu? We're all here for you. I know you don't like people worrying, but we are. Kai's worried about you, Yeonjun and I – We're all worried. We just want to make sure you're okay." Soobin kicks off his shoes, moving up more on the bed. He lets go of Beomgyu's hand, placing it down on the blanket and giving it a small pat. "This morning... Whatever that was about, we're here for you. No one is expecting for you to wake up one day and act like nothing ever happened, but we do expect for you to come to us when you're ready. No matter how long that takes."

Beomgyu sits there in silence for a moment, his gaze fixed on Soobin's face, and specifically his eyes that reflect a genuine concern that seems to pierce through his carefully constructed facade. The silence between them stretches into an almost tangible void, and all he can do is nod, unsure of how he's even supposed to respond to Soobin. A mere "thank you" doesn't seem like enough, but he also doesn't know how to talk to Soobin about what's going on.