Hazbin Hotel Group Chat

Shit Hits the Fan

Pop My Cherri:
@ScreenQueen You've been laughing your ass off for the last 10 minutes. FUCKING SHARE BITCH! What's so damn funny?
Screen Queen:
The fact that Vox apparently asked Alastor to join the Vees ages ago, and he refused. His name starts with an A though, so did his ass decline because he'd have to become FUCKING VALASTOR! LMFAO
Harder Daddy:
Better than the Val you did have.
Freaky Face:
That is not why I declined.
Vagina:
VALASTOR! FUCKING HELL! LMFAO
Big Ass Forehead:
I never invited him to join. That's a lie.
Freaky Face:
No, it isn't.
Freaky Face:
Also, @ShortKing... Where's that video?
Short King:
We changed our minds. We scrapped the whole... Stabbing him in the ass thing.
Danger Tits:
It felt too invasive. I still stabbed him though.
Short King:
I had to hold him down because he tried to attack us. We had a bet though, so... That's why I couldn't film.
Daddy Issues:
... And where is Adam now?
Lilith:
... Recovering. God, all of you were loud as fuck.
Danger Tits:
You're fucking welcome.
Lilith:
... I thought you were loyal to him.
Danger Tits:
I did some "soul searching". I didn't find much, but I realized... He's a fucking idiot.
Vagina:
... Soul searching? Bitch, what soul?
Daddy Issues:
I thought you two were getting along now... :(
Vagina:
No. @DangerTits, this is my song to you bitch.
Vagina:

Danger Tits:
... Pay closer attention to those lyrics.
Dick Master:
YOU DID FUCK? I WAS RIGHT! SUCK IT!
Vagina:
... God damn it. I just meant the title.
Danger Tits:
Either way, if I was in a relationship with someone, I wouldn't fucking cheat. I'm an asshole, but not that kind of asshole.
Two Dicks:
No offense, but I find that hard to believe. You seem like the type to cheat, but out of revenge. They do something that pisses you off, so you cheat on them.
Big Ass Forehead:
Damn. Fucking brutal.
Danger Tits:
OFFENSE FUCKING TAKEN! I WOULD NOT!
Vagina:
No, she wouldn't.
Harder Daddy:
Oh?~ And how would you know that?
Freaky Face:
Considering how loyal she was to @DickMaster, if she were to have a romantic partner, I assume that loyalty would be the same, maybe greater.
Vagina:
Exactly. That's what I was going to say.
Screen Queen:
Damn, I need someone like that. LMAO
Pop My Cherri:
EVERYONE! LET'S START SHIPPING @ScreenQueen AND @DangerTits. LMFAO
Short King:
What's shipping?
Freaky Face:
I honestly don't know either.
Dick Master:
HA! GAY!
Lilith:
ADAM! SHUT THE FUCK UP!
Daddy Issues:
Dad, and Alastor... Shipping is when you basically pair two people up in a relationship. So, Vaggie and I are a couple, so shipping us would make sense. Angel and Husk seem like they're interested in each other, so shipping them would also make some sort of sense because seeing them in a potential future relationship isn't far off from what might happen.
Whiskers:
WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU JUST FUCKING SAY?
Harder Daddy:
FUCK LEVEL2! HELL YEAH!
Short King:
Got it. But... Shipping @ScreenQueen and @DangerTits makes no sense.
Pop My Cherri:
It's just funny. That's all.
Screen Queen:
It's like when I used to piss Vox off by shipping him with Alastor.
Big Ass Forehead:
I TOLD YOU TO NEVER MENTION THAT TO ANYONE!
Screen Queen:
I DON'T WORK WITH YOU ASSHOLE! I CAN DO WHATEVER THE FUCK I WANT!
STAB:
LET'S SHIP EVERYONE! YAY!
Two Dicks:
Niffty, no.
STAB:
Fine... Let's play a game.
Danger Tits:
Knife Monopoly?
Daddy Issues:
What the hell is "Knife Monopoly"?
STAB:
I don't know but it sounds STABBY!
Harder Daddy:
... Let's call each other out. If you know an embarrassing fact about someone, call them out.
Daddy Issues:
That's mean though. :(
Vagina:
... A long ass time ago, I caught @DangerTits staring at some hot girl... And yes, I mean in the way you think.
Danger Tits:
... I would deny that, but I can't. Don't know what happened to her by the way. LMFAO
Danger Tits:
Also... @DickMaster had revenge sex with some guy because that guy stole some bitch he wanted to fuck. Jokes on him though... The guy he fucked was bisexual and enjoyed that shit.
Dick Master:
SHUT UP!
Daddy Issues:
... This is mean. Stop!
Dick Master:
@ShortKing has always had to sleep with at least one rubber duck.
Lilith:
Everyone fucking knows that. It's no secret.
Short King:
Everyone knows that Charlie had an emo phase, right? She also had a country phase, which was honestly more disappointing than the emo phase.
Daddy Issues:
DAD!
Vagina:
Just join in. Hell, you can do me. I'm giving you permission, so it's not that mean.
Harder Daddy:
HA! BOTTOM! SHE CAN DO YOU!
Vagina:
Shut up.
Daddy Issues:
... The first time I told Vaggie I loved her, she had a full on gay panic... And despite claiming she doesn't do that anymore, she does.
Vagina:
... Says the one who literally screamed the first time we kissed. Like, screamed so loud the fucking window broke.
Vagina:
Also, @Whiskers purrs if you pet him on the head. You have to do it in the right place... It works every time.
Pop My Cherri:
... Are you just petting him or something.
Harder Daddy:
No. I did once and she was there, and he was purring. I did it several more times, and I guess she saw that shit.
Whiskers:
... I'm gonna call someone out, but I'm saving that shit for last. You idiots keep going.
Pop My Cherri:
@TwoDicks likes getting pegged. LMFAO
Two Dicks:
@Harder Daddy is afraid of bugs, specifically moths.
Harder Daddy:
... THERE'S A REASON TO THAT DICKFACE!
Harder Daddy:
@PopMyCherri cried over foods having feelings while high once. LMFAO
Screen Queen:
@BigAssForehead literally gets off to his fantasy of defeating Alastor. It's fucking gross.
Big Ass Forehead:
AND YOU CRY ALONE BECAUSE YOU HAVE NO ONE BUT FOLLOWERS ONLINE WHICH MEAN NOTHING IN COMPARISON TO ACTUAL FRIENDS! FUCK YOU!
Danger Tits:
... You took that too fucking far.
Daddy Issues:
That's what I was worried about.
Freaky Face:
@BigAssForehead has tried to bribe several people with sex, including Carmine. He has installed cameras in random houses just to watch people naked. He has pictures of me on every wall in his room and he throws darts at them while getting aroused. He malfunctioned once because I sent him a message about me defeating another overlord, and it pissed him off. I could keep going.
Harder Daddy:
... This was a bad idea. Sorry.
Lilith:
It started off harmless enough. It's alright.
Whiskers:
@FreakyFace is owned by someone.
Freaky Face:
...
Daddy Issues:
... Oh shit.
Lilith:
@ShortKing, get to their location please.
Short King:
I'm on my way. I had a feeling shit was going to happen.
Vagina:
... Well fuck.
Dick Master:
HA! @Whiskers is probably fucked, @ScreenQueen is probably having a mental breakdown, and @BigAssForehead is probably malfunctioning. Sucks to be you fuckers.
Lilith:
I TOLD YOU TO SHUT THE FUCK UP!
Harder Daddy:
... Not to be that person, but let's all stop chatting and deal with this mess.
Two Dicks:
For once, you're being rational.
STAB:
Lucifer just appeared upside down on the stairs...
Pop My Cherri:
... Yep, let's deal with this bullshit.