Hazbin Hotel Group Chat

The Porn Fiasco 

Harder Daddy:
Who is fucking? God damn, it's so loud.
Short King:
Let's go down the list!
Daddy Issues:
Let's not go down the list.
Vagina:
It's not us obviously...
Pear:
Not us either, but it is loud.
Mouth:
... @PopMyCherri @TwoDicks My immediate thought is to blame the two of you.
Two Dicks:
We're at a bar.
Pop My cherri:
We left 20 minutes ago. You literally said bye to us. LMAO
Mouth:
... I don't pay attention.
Vagina:
... Oh my fucking God... @DangerTits
Danger Tits:
... Shut the fuck up. I know what you're thinking.
Screen Queen:
We were about to watch a movie.
Harder Daddy:
Then who the actual hell is fucking?
Lilith:
Have you ever considered it's happening outside? It's happened before.
Whiskers:
... That happens a lot. Can people stop screwing outside?
Danger Tits:
It's not outside... Someone broke into the hotel and is watching porn. And, I'll give you a hint on who it is... FUCKING ADAM!
Daddy Issues:
That is not a hint. LMAO
STAB:
... Is he sitting in a closet watching that?
Screen Queen:
Yes, yes he is.
Kayden:
@DickMaster Turn it down. It sounds gross.
Dick Master:
It's hot. No.
Whiskers:
Go watch that shit somewhere else.
Freaky Face:
... I will destroy whatever device you're using if you don't turn that shit off.
Dick Master:
This is Hell. I can do what I want.
God:
Would you guys be mad if I banished him to Hell permanently. I'm sick of him being up here.
Short King:
DON'T YOU FUCKING DARE!
Lilith:
... FUCKING NO!
Big Ass Forehead:
Go ahead. He can keep @ScreenQueen from getting fucked again.
Danger Tits:
... He can't stop shit, and neither can you.
Screen Queen:
FUCKING HELL! DO YOU WANT TO FUCK AGAIN OR SOMETHING?
Squeak:
... You guys realize relationships should be more than intercourse?
Danger Tits:
Of course I know that. We're discussing sex though, nothing more, nothing less.
Big Ass Forehead:
SEE? SHE WILL NEVER LOVE YOU!
Screen Queen:
... I fucking bet she would.
Vagina:
... Why do I feel like they're going to start a relationship, but only to prove Vox wrong and to piss off Adam?
Roo:
Because they probably will do that. Not sure how that would end though.
Pop My Cherri:
I started a relationship to piss someone off once... It ended horribly. I don't recommend it.
Screen Queen:
That's fair but... If we did ever do that, I think it would be fine, and if it ended... We'd still be on good terms. Awkward, but good.
Vagina:
... I would disagree, but now... I can't. You're probably right.
Mouth:
... The porn is getting louder.
Pear:
What kind of shit is he watching? It sounds... Kinky.
Dick Master:
... It's hot. That's all I will say.
Freaky Face:
Well... You're done watching it.
Dick Master:
HE DESTROYED MY SHIT! FUCK YOU!
Whiskers:
... Never thought I'd say this but... Thank you Alastor.
Freaky Face:
It was my pleasure. That noise was disturbing my peace.
Dick Master:
Fine... I'm going to join the bitches watching a movie.
Danger Tits:
... No you're fucking not.
Dick Master:
Oh yeah, I am. And, I'm gonna sit between you two so you can't fuck.
Screen Queen:
HOLY SHIT! FUCKING PUT ME DOWN!
Vagina:
... I just saw a blur fly out of the door.
Danger Tits:
Change of plans... We're not watching that movie.
Screen Queen:
She fucking grabbed me and flew off. I swear bitch, if you drop my ass...
Danger Tits:
If you don't stop moving, I might.
Harder Daddy:
Well, hold on tight because the pussy blocker just flew after you.
Short King:
And I'm chasing him! WOOHOO!
Vagina:
... Now I want to follow. LMAO
Daddy Issues:
... I guess we're coming too...
Pop My Cherri:
LMAO, you all just went past the bar we're at.
Harder Daddy:
Send updates.
Screen Queen:
UPDATE! I THINK I'M GOING TO DIE!
Danger Tits:
Stop fucking moving and you won't.
Dick Master:
Yeah you will bitch... OH SHIT!
Vagina:
HE FLEW INTO A FUCKING BUILDING! LMFAO
Short King:
... He knocked himself out. Fucking idiot.
Lilith:
Lucifer, might I remind you that you got drunk, flew in circles, and repeatedly hit your head on the ceiling, resulting in a giant bump on your head. And now, you're calling Adam a fucking idiot?
Short King:
He's sober. Totally different.
Whiskers:
He's not wrong.
Big Ass Forehead:
WHO DESTROYED MY WALL?
Screen Queen:
LMFAO, That makes this whole thing worth it.
Big Ass Forehead:
Start running again bitch because now I'm coming after you!
Danger Tits:
... If Adam couldn't catch us, what makes you think you could?
Big Ass Forehead:
Mind control... I'll find a way to have you come back.
Danger Tits:
... You'll have to get close enough. Besides... It won't work on me bitch.
Vagina:
Even if it could work, I'm willing to bet she could fly with her eyes closed...
Screen Queen:
LET'S NOT TEST THAT SHIT!
Vagina:
No, I'm being serious. We were trained to be able to do that.
Daddy Issues:
... Really? Not gonna lie... That's badass.
Harder Daddy:
So... A flying race with eyes closed is going to happen, right? Everyone who can fly will participate, even if you weren't trained.
Pear:
Hell no.
Squeak:
Considering I ran into a window 5 minutes ago while trying to walk into another room... Definitely not.
Whiskers:
... Like usual, I'm too sober for this.
Screen Queen:
And there's Vox... He's approaching... WHY THE FUCK AREN'T WE MOVING?
Danger Tits:
... Just wait, and you might want to hold on.
Short King:
Holy shit... That looked dangerous.
Vagina:
... Vox looks pissed. LMAO
Big Ass Forehead:
Come back and face me! PUSSIES!
Danger Tits:
I would, but alone. I'm keeping her away from you, not myself.
Screen Queen:
See? I think we'd be totally fine together.
Pop My Cherri:
You might be right... HOLD ON!
Two Dicks:
... Are we going to bet on it again?
Short King:
The sins and I already have a bet going, except Mammon. We don't allow him to join bets. LMFAO
Harder Daddy:
... Fucking why? Most of them don't even know this whole relationship thing.
Short King:
No, they do. I gave them all of the details.
Dick Master:
COUNT ME IN! I'M BETTING AGAINST YOU!
Danger Tits:
... You realize if I don't like the individuals on one side of a bet, I'm going to make sure the other side wins, right?
Screen Queen:
... Either you genuinely like me like that, or you just like to piss people off.
Danger Tits:
... I like to piss people off.
Lilith:
Sure... that's totally the reason.
Screen Queen:
You know, if I wasn't here with her, that might slightly hurt my feelings. But... The look on her face that she's completely failing to hide tells me everything I need to know, so I'm fine. LMFAO