Hazbin Hotel Group Chat

What the fuck is this?

Carfight:
Hello all. I would just like you all to know that my sickness is gone, and I would like to apologize for how unlike myself I was, except for me telling Vox to shut the fuck up. I meant that.
Big Ass Forehead:
Go fuck yourself.
Carfight:
You do that enough for all of us.
Harder Daddy:
DAMN!
Screen Queen:
I have a theory! OK, so some of us have obviously thought about Carmine and Zestial being together, but what if we're all fucking wrong. What if Carmine had kids, said fuck men, and is actually a raging fucking lesbian? LMAO
Vagina:
What the fuck is wrong with your brain?
Screen Queen:
FUCKING EVERYTHING! But seriously, consider that shit.
Carfight:
No.
Whiskers:
... That answers that then...
Pop My Cherri:
Speaking of lesbians... Angie and I found some shitty ass pride shirts and...
Harder Daddy:

Mouth:
Yeah, that does not fit you. You're a fucking bottom.
Harder Daddy:
@Whiskers I'm buying that shirt for you then~.
Whiskers:
Like hell you are.
Pop My Cherri:
Then, there's this dumb fucking lesbian shirt...
Pop My Cherri:

Pear:
I mean... Kissing girls is great, but I'm with someone...
Vagina:
Fucking same. Oh shit, that reminds me of a story from back in my heavenly days. LMAO
Danger Tits:
Do you mean your fucking sexuality discovery when you made out with several exorcists just to "make sure" you were gay? LMFAO
Vagina:
Fuck off.
Harder Daddy:
Oh, Vagina... I found this shirt specifically for you...
Harder Daddy:

Vagina:
... Are you being fucking racist?
Screen Queen:
FUCKING CANCELLED! 💀
Harder Daddy:
Fucking whatever.
Pop My Cherri:
OK, but this bi shirt... The fuck?
Pop My Cherri:

STAB:
VIOLENCE! I'm straight though.
Squeak:
... Are there no good pride shirts?
Harder Daddy:
I don't know... I'd argue this pan one is pretty fucking good.
Harder Daddy:

Squeak:
... With consent, right?
Whiskers:
I fucking hope so.
Harder Daddy:
You just ruined that shirt.
Lilith:
I can make some good ass pride shirts...
Short King:
We still need to organize that fucking pride parade.
Daddy Issues:
Wait until we get back. I have ideas!
Roo:
Oh shit... You're in Cannibal Town. How's your little trip going?
Kayden:
Great! Well, except for the fact that I'm hungry and I don't feel like becoming a cannibal.
Squeak:
Same! But I don't want to accidentally reveal that I'm hungry, then get offered something and decline!
Harder Daddy:
The sandwich place reopened. It's on the edge of Cannibal Town. I literally said that last time we were there. Just go there.
Dick Master:
FUCK THAT SANDWICH PLACE!
Roo:
You were just upset because you had to sit at a table with Lilith, Lucifer, and myself.
Dick Master:
IT WAS MY OWN PERSONAL HELL AND I HATED IT!
Lilith:
That was the point asshole.
Kayden:
I like that place! We should go!
Freaky Face:
Great idea. Their cannibal options are delectable.
Harder Daddy:
I wanna go back to Vagina's sexuality discovery story... WHAT IS YOUR BODY COUNT WHORE?
Vagina:
First off... Why the fuck can't you just call me by my name. Second, like 2... Obviously Charlie, and one other. I wasn't just fucking exorcists.
Dick Master:
I have, and holy shit... Some of them are terrible in bed, but they're still hot. Others... FUCKING SHIT! Best sex!
Danger Tits:
Shut the fuck up.
Daddy Issues:
Who's the one other?
Vagina:
... I seriously don't remember her name, but it sucked.
Dick Master:
... YOU'RE JUST HIDING THE FACT THAT YOU FUCKED THE TRAITOR!
Danger Tits:
Stop calling me a fucking traitor, and once again... We never fucked.
Screen Queen:
Yeah... If they did fuck, it wouldn't have been terrible.
Screen Queen:
FUCKING SHIT! WHY WON'T IT LET ME DELETE THAT?
Pop My Cherri:
LMFAO, are we revealing shit now?
Harder Daddy:
I can tell you who has the best dick in Hell.
Whiskers:
Fuck no, because you're going to say yourself.
Harder Daddy:
... But it's true.
Lilith:
I don't know about that... Let's not forget Lucifer exists.
Daddy Issues:
DO NOT CONTINUE! FUCK!
Harder Daddy:
I'll be the judge of that. @ShortKing SHOW ME YOUR DICK!
Screen Queen:
OK, all of you need to stop asking what's wrong with me, especially when he says shit like that.
Danger Tits:
No... There's still shit wrong with you.
Screen Queen:
Go fuck yourself.
Danger Tits:
How about I fuck you instead?
Pear:
GET A FUCKING ROOM!
Big Ass Forehead:
Or film it... I can broadcast it.
Screen Queen:
Fuck no.
God:
I've been trying to keep up with this conversation, but what the actual fuck is going on?
Roo:
I don't think anyone knows what's going on.
Squeak:
OK, update... We're coming back early and not going to the sandwich place. Susan bit me.
Daddy Issues:
... Fucking old bitch.
Freaky Face:
I'm staying back with Rosie to handle the situation.
Kayden:
@ShortKing Can you make us pancakes?
Short King:
HELL YEAH!
Short King:
Why am I just now seeing the message from Angel about seeing my dick? Fuck no.
Harder Daddy:
I'll give you a duck. I'll sneak to Earth again and find you a cool ass duck.
Short King:
DEAL!
Two Dicks:
A duck for a dick...
Pop My Cherri:
A dick for a duck...
STAB:
Duck dick duck dick dick duck duck dick duck.
Dick Master:
Fucking what?
Mouth:
Niffty, that was fucking poetic. LMAO
Carfight:
... You all have problems.