Ours After All (All Ours, #2)

Chapter 40

Joshua

Patience has never been my strong suit, but these days, it's felt like my only option.

We've been home for over a month now, and Nara is no different than she was at the hospital. She doesn't have to be on bed rest anymore, the doctor even encouraged mild exercise like walking or things like yoga when we went in for a check-up last week, but she won't have any of it.

She's withdrawn into herself, a closed book that I can't seem to open. The weight of her mental state hangs heavy in the air, casting a pall over our home. Every day feels like a battle against an invisible force, and I'm trying my best to navigate uncharted territory.

Witch each day, she retreats further into her shell. She spends most of her time in bed, cocooned in blankets with eyes that no longer hold the spark of life. I try to coax her out, to encourage her to join me for meals or take short walks, but my efforts are met with silence or dismissive gestures.

I want to scream, to shake her out of this numbness, but I know it won't help. Instead, I also retreat into myself, carrying the weight of her slump on my shoulders, doing everything I can to make her feel comfortable.

I try to find solace in small tasks, like cooking her favorite meals or tidying up the house. Each act of care is a silent prayer for her recovery, a desperate attempt to bridge the growing chasm between us.

But sometimes, in the quiet moments of the night, when sleep escapes and the darkness threatens to consume, I find myself questioning everything. How do you save someone who doesn't want to be saved? How do you reach someone who has closed themselves off from the world?

I sit by her side, I hold her hand when she lets me, but even though her eyes are open and she's sitting right next to me, she's not there. That Nara spark, the liveliness and joy she carried in her big beautiful eyes, none of it is there anymore, and it breaks my heart to see.

So at times, once in a while, I'm grateful she won't look at me. So I don't get reminded of what I lost.

Her.

⭐️

''She won't eat.'' Isabella sighs.

''Told you she wouldn't.''

She wipes her hand over her face. ''I still had to try, Josh. She has to eat something.''

''She'll probably eat dinner tonight. And if she doesn't. she'll make herself a snack late at night when she gets really hungry and can't sleep, trust me.'' I tell her. ''You can't push it.''

She throws herself on the couch, rubbing her hands over her temple. ''How do you do it?''

''Do what?''

''Deal with her!'' she points to the room Nara is currently in. ''I love her to death, but that is not Nara in there.''

I shake my head. If only she knew.

''She almost threw the sandwich at me.'' she throws her hands up. ''Last week, she tossed a cup of tea back to Soyan so hard, she has burn marks on her hand.''

''She doesn't mean it, you know.'' I tell her the words I've been repeating to myself multiple times a day since we've gotten home. ''She's just frustrated. She doesn't mean to take it out on all of you. I'm sorry she does.''

''And you.''

What did I do? ''Me?''

''You, Josh.'' she exclaims. ''You're here, with her always. Dealing with her anger and frustration all by yourself. I'm sorry, are you kidding me? We should be here more.''