Chaelisa | Lisa G!P
Lisa Manoban lives life the way she wants, no concern for the opinion of others. She cares for no one, is completely unrepentant, and she has no desire to change her ways.
Roseanne Park works under Lisa as her PA. She despises he...
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I glanced over at Penny with a frown. I had been excited the same jazz trio we’d seen before was doing an encore performance this evening, but she’d been off the entire night. More than once, she had lifted her hand, wiping away a tear as it rolled down her cheek. When I asked, concerned, if she was all right, she waved me away with an impatient hand.
“I’m fine.”
Yet, she seemed to be anything except fine.
I wheeled her back to her room, hoping the treat I had waiting would pick up her spirits.
Roseanne mentioned Penny wasn’t eating well the past couple days and seemed tired. Tonight, her caregiver told me she picked at her dinner and had only eaten lunch because Roseanne fed it to her.
I knew Roseanne was worried. She had considered canceling her yoga class, but I encouraged her to go. I reminded her only two classes remained, then she could join us every Tuesday. I would miss my time with Penny, but the classes started again a month later, so it would be back to us at that point. My favorite part of the night was listening to Penny tell stories of Roseanne. There were so many—some Roseanne herself had undoubtedly forgotten. They often contained humorous, embarrassing moments that made me chuckle.
I sat beside Penny, sliding the pizza box open with a smile. “Voila!”
When I discovered, next to cheeseburgers, pizza was her favorite food, I started bringing it to her regularly. It was fine with the home, and I made sure I had plenty for the staff on occasion. One day I brought enough pizza so any resident who wanted some could enjoy it. I was a hero that day.
Today, however, it was only for Penny.
She took a slice yet made no move to eat it. With a sigh, I took her slice back and returned it to the box. I wrapped my hand around her fragile wrist, rubbing the delicate skin of her palm.
“Penny, what is it? What’s wrong?”
She heaved a deep exhale of air, the sound drained and resigned. “I’m tired.”
“You want me to get Connie? She can get you ready for bed.” Sana was off tonight, but she liked Connie.
“No. I don’t want to go to bed.”
“I don’t understand.”
Withdrawing her hand, she rubbed it over her face in a weary manner. “I’m tired of all this.”
“Your room?” If she wanted a different one, I’d get it for her.
“Of being here. In this... life, if you can call it that.”
I had never heard her talk this way. “Penny—”
She reached out and wrapped her hand around mine.
“I forget things, Lisa. Time goes on and I don’t know if it’s the same day that it was only a moment ago. Rosie comes to visit and I can’t remember if she was here hours ago, days ago, or if she just left the room for a minute. Some days, I don’t recognize anything, and I’m scared. I know there are days I don’t know her.” Her voice shook, eyes glimmering with tears. “I don’t know myself most days.”
