Chapter 4

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DANNIE'S P.O.V


"Tobs, can I come in?"

"Dannie? Hey what's up? I thought you're having dinner with your..."

I threw a deep sigh. I hope Toby could read my stress level and sadness as we're talking on the phone. I could't even start something. I don't know where to start.

"It's not a dinner." Toby fixed his last words.

"Can I come in? You home?"

"All three of us. Or...yeah, anything, anyone you specifically want to speak with."

"Thanks for being so loyal. I'll be there in about 5."

I quickly grabbed my stuff. Mom and Dad were still in living room. I knew it. They would torture me with questions.

"Honey? You're hungry?" Mom offered a plate of chicken wings.

"Not now." I grabbed a car key.

"Where you going?"

I put the key back to its place. "You're letting me go or what?"

"Stop being childish, Dayana."

"Wow. That hurts, Dad." I stepped back. "Don't try to find me."

"Dannie! Dannie sweetheart for God's sake where you going?" Mom chased me out to the front door.

I took my bicycle. Glad I wore my hoodie. The ride to McDonough's might take few minutes and it's pretty cold outside.

"To find peace and make peace with myself because I was born always with no choice."

I cried. Again. I sniffed so hard trying to ride this bicycle in stable move between unclear sight because crying. My parents couldn't be more unfair about this thing. I wanted to be okay. I wanted to feel okay. But my previous life in Laredo that I once thought would be amazing, didn't give me much amazing things to be remembered.

"Tobs." I called, then hung up, just to sign him I was outside.

He opened the front door immediately. And caught my eyes again. "Hey. Dan, you're gonna come in or what?"

"Oh sorry. Yeah." I walked inside. "Where's the bros?"

"Over here!" Connor waved from his lazy couch. "Happy birthday you sweet human. Come here give me a kiss."

I fell into Connor's hug and unintendedly teared up a bit. I made sure he didn't realize that. Faked a yawn, of course. It's late dinner time. They would buy my sleepy gesture.

"Riley?" I shouted.

"Just made a coffee for you." He kissed top of my head. "Happy birthday."

"Thank you." I sipped it.

"So, what we're gonna do?" Toby wrapped his arms around me.

"I don't know. Anything." I faked a focus expression playing Riley's phone.

"You don't get on your bicycle only to play with his phone, do you?" Toby took it. "What, Dannie?"

Why couldn't I even hold the tears for anymore minutes? I kneeled, fell broken in front of these three people I hope I could lean onto. They gave me few seconds to take a deep breath. Connor kindly rubbed my back. Toby played with my fingers.

"I'm..." I looked at them in the eyes tried to find that peace, but failed. "...Moving out..."

Toby just dropped his jaw. Connor stopped rubbing my back because shocked. Riley stared at me knowing I couldn't handle anymore breathe to stop these tears. I cried in the middle of their kind arms. The only people in this world who could understand, and were willing to understand, what I've been through.

"When is it?" Toby walked to the kitchen.

"Couple weeks." I played with a tissue. "Happy birthday to me. Haha."

"Dannie, Dannie..." Connor buried me in his arms again. "We don't wanna lose you."

"I don't want to lose anything either Con." I whispered. "Promise me you guys gonna beep me while in Texas, alright?"

"Laredo is far." Toby looked desperatedly upset.

"I'm sorry Tobs, I'm so sorry..."

"It's not your fault." Riley stroked my hair. "Laredo would be fun. Should be fun."

"I hope." I glanced at Toby who didn't really approach me. He stayed there in devastation. "I hope..."

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