Chapter 10

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TOBY'S P.O.V


"Stop it bro."

I looked up. "What?"

"She isn't here and maybe mostly unreachable. Stop torturing yourself. And her."

"Am I torturing her?"

"There's nothing else you can do except to be here with both arms wide open when she comes home. But now, it's called waiting."

I stared at Riley. He has the point. I kept checking my phone every five minutes. I tore some pictures from her old album and kept them in my pocket to stay with me everyday, doesn't matter if we're on tour. I slipped her name on my every line when I spoke to people about basically anything. I kept telling 'if she was here things would be much better', that I guess people started feeling tired of that.

I regret I didn't say it clearly enough for her to hear, on the day she left.

What hurts the most? She didn't reply. She didn't do the forth. I gave her a hundred yet she barely gave me anything. Dannie didn't ask back if I was okay. My Dannie didn't even read the texts I've sent.

And it's been three weeks.

"You okay?" Connor checked our silence moment at this tour bus lounge.

"Sure." I nodded to Riley. "Sure."

"He's not." I heard Riley whispering to Connor but I chose to throw myself into my bunk.

Few hours later I woke up to tall buildings. We're in New York. Later tonight we would have a show with Fifth Harmony. I've always loved the groove this city has. But suddenly it's all gone. To me, even the normal volume setting on my phone sounded too loud. Short, I needed a break.

"We're here guys! Let's go!" James clapped his hand, the sign we should go inside the venue.

"Take your guitar." Ryan squeezed my shoulders.

"Something wrong?" Thomas brought up my guitar case that I left in my bunk.

"I was about to take that. Thanks." I smiled.

"Dude, if it's about Dannie..."

"Tom I'm okay. I guess."

Thomas left me with meaningful expression. "Alright. If you say so."

The crew were currently working on the prep. I saw Anthony managed the merch corner. James checked the sound system. I could also hear the Fifth Harmony girls did warm-ups in the room next to ours. Tour should be dynamic. Yet I was barely alive.

This unexplainable feeling and bad mood took me here. I uncontrollably searched for her name on Instagram. Bam.

Ice cream hang?

I threw my phone on Riley's backpack that we usually left off here in the green room. I hid it between equipments so I wouldn't hear the notification sound. As much as I would die only to see a text beep from Dannie, it did sucks to know that. Might as well just delete my Instagram.

"Whoa. He's back." Ryan noticed my awkward move.

"Soundcheck, right?" I excitedly asked. No, not excited, it was anger.

"Yeah...?" Connor walked up to me. "Bro if there's something we could help..."

"Just please." I took a deep breath. "Let's soundchecking."

"Rare." Riley whispered.

"It's good to be focus again." I replied in short.

"For a good reason I hope?" Thomas opened the door for himself.

"For whatever reason." I swept my hidden tears away.

Crap. Why would I even care. Of course she didn't reply. Ice cream kept her hands busy.

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