I'm Staying With You (A Hobbit Fanfiction)

Chapter 54

When he's out of sight, I walk back into the mountain and head to my room. Kili's token sits on my bedside table, and I pick it up.

A collection of mine and Fili's daggers sit at the foot of my bed. Looking at them makes my heart hurt.

There's a soft knock at the door.

"Come in," I say quietly. Bofur pokes his head in.

"Nossa, we're preparing a feast. Will you join us?" His eyes land on the token in my hand and the daggers on my bed. "But you don't have to if you don't feel up to it."

"No, no, I'll come. I'm fine," I reply quickly. I stand, and Bofur loops my arm around his.

"Come, my queen. The feast will be wonderful."

I chuckle lightly and allow Bofur to lead me to the dining hall. When we arrive, everyone is eating, laughing, and telling tales.

All I can think about are the seats at the table that shouldn't be empty.

I sit down and help myself to some food. I eat in silence and listen to the others talk.

"Nossa, what are some of your plans now that you are queen?" someone asks. I look up from my food and sigh.

"I am traveling to the Blue Mountains soon. I plan on bringing the dwarves of Erebor back to their homeland now that it is safe. I also have some unfinished business there that I need to attend to."

Everyone nods and murmurs in agreement.

"Are you taking anyone to accompany you?" Bofur asks.

"I will take anyone who wishes to come. I will not force another adventure on you," I reply. Everyone chuckles.

When the meal is complete, I head to the throne room. I sit down and observe everything around me.

I have the throne, but I don't feel powerful. Right now, I feel weak and sorrowful.

I place my elbow on the armrest and put my face in my hands, starting to sob. I have to be strong for my kingdom, but I just can't.

I miss them so much. Thorin, Fili, Kili. My family. The people that stayed by me through thick and thin ever since I was a small child.

I stand up and turn, my cloak swishing behind me. I make my way down to the entrance of the mountain, which is still the same as it was after we used the bell to knock it down.

The wind rustles my hair ever so slightly and the stars twinkle merrily. The moon is big and bright, casting moonlight across the plains.

Flashbacks of Fili, Kili, and I staring up at that same moon come to me and I have to grab hold of the wall to remain balanced.

I decide to spend the night here. I find a comfortable spot and sit down, watching the sky.

"Nossa?"

I turn around at the dwarf who addressed me and see Dwalin standing there.

"Hello Dwalin," I reply sadly.

"What are you doing out here?"

"Watching the sky." I shrug.

Dwalin doesn't say anything, just sits down beside me.

"I know this whole ordeal is hard on you, as it is hard on all of us. But my queen, if you are going to be traveling to the Blue Mountains, you need your strength and strength comes with rest."

I sigh in defeat.

"I'll go in a minute."

"Goodnight, Nossa."

Dwalin walks away and I look at the stars once again.

"I know you're somewhere out there, somewhere far away..." 

A/N: The last line is from 'Talking to the Moon' by Bruno Mars.