My Boyfriend is Gay (Larry Stylinson)

~Seventeen~

MIA'S POV

As soon as I saw the interview and his announcement, I texted Louis. I instantly felt that something was wrong with him and no matter what he put me through, I needed to be there for him.

When I saw him kiss Harry, I was on shock. I felt too many emotions at the same time such as pain, anger, sadness, surprise...

I got back home and started thinking about all of this. I felt stupid. Incredibly dumb for not seeing all these signs that I should've seen. These two boys were definitively more than friends. They had always been.

Personnally, I just think that Louis is not able to admit it to himself and to the world yet. He's scared and he would want to be 'normal' for one aspect of his life.

However, I can see that this is totally killing him. It's hard to take that smile off of his face but once it's taken, the pain is real. 

I love Louis with every little piece of my heart. He's my bestfriend and he makes me incredibly happy. I know that he feels bad about hurting me. I also know that he can't be as happy with me as I am with him. He's stuck with me.

Louis probably loves Harry as much as I love him. That's why I can understand the pain he's going through and it's exactly why I've made the decision of letting him go. It's not what I want, but it's what I need to do. He loves Harry and I don't want to be an obstacle.

*****

I was waiting for him at the airport and I was quite nervous. I didn't know what to say or how to react. I didn't know if I should kiss him or not. I didn't know how he was feeling...

When I saw him, our eyes locked instantly. I still saw this pain in his eyes and still couldn't find that perfect smile on his face. He walked towards me and fell into my arms.

I hugged him during at least 2 long minutes without even talking. He felt so fragile, as if a single move could break him into pieces.

"I'm so sorry" he whispered softly and I could feel the honesty in his words.

"It's okay Louis" I said, playing softly with his messy hair.

"I didn't want to cheat on you. It's just so hard with me and Harry..." he said, not even able to look into my eyes.

"I know Louis" I said, kissing his cheek. "I love you more than anything and I will be there for you no matter what. But if you're in love with Harry and you want to be with him, just go Louis. I don't want to be the one keeping you from being happy."

"I love you too I can't be with him, I know that my place is with you" he said, his voice breaking. It wasn't truthful, he was just trying to convince himself.

"Is it what you want or what you should do? Stop listening to your brain Louis and start following your heart just a little bit. You're right, it'll be hard to come out and to be with Harry. But if that's what you want, you can do it. Fight for him. Love will always find its way" I said, tears started to fill my eyes. "I'll always be there for you no matter what. It's not what I want but I know that letting you go is the right thing to do. You can't keep on lying to yourself over again. You love him and it's killing you not being able to express this love. I'm not going to hold you back anymore. Do it Louis, fight. I'll always support you through any decision you make"

Tears slowly started to rush down his cheeks and he took me and his arms. He broke down right in my arms and all this pain was coming out.

"I'm so sorry. You're such an amazing girl I didn't want to play with you I just... I really wanted to love you more than him I swear" he said, still crying. It totally broke my heart to see him that way.

" I know you tried Louis. Love is something you just can't control" I said, leading him to the cab as we drove to his place.

"I wish I could" he answered.

We both sat in the back of the cab and he didn't let go of me. He was holding me so tight until he finally fell asleep.

"I will always love you" I whispered in his ear, finally starting to understand what was going on in my life.

My boyfriend is gay.