Run Away; C.R

(nine)

riley:

they're all at school, and my boredom is taking over my senses and replacing them with ideas. so many ideas.

i quickly slipped on some black leggings and a checkered flannel, sliding my converse on before running down the porch steps. the air was muggy and humid, almost making it difficult for breathing.

i made my way to the local grocery store, knowing exactly where it is from when i had to make some emergency trips for painkillers while taking care of chandler. he just got off the cast yesterday, leaving me alone to pursue the day without them.

making a left at the stoplight, i make my way into a decently empty convenient store, going straight to the back towards the paint isle. there's very few people shopping, leaving it nice and peaceful as i stroll the isles contently.

i wrap my fingers successfully around a blue bottle of spray paint, smiling in victory. the lady behind the counter looks down at me strangely, glancing back up towards the many many bottles of various colors of spray paint.

"school project." i lie, smiling cunningly as she bags my items and hands them back to me.

i kick the rocks beneath my feet, adding marks and scratches to my sneakers. the wind blows my hair in all different directions, irritating me to the point where i carelessly throw it back into a bun, leaving a few strands to cascade down my face.

i wanted to do something for myself today. i needed to get things off my mind, i needed to clear it from all things stressful. i left to avoid stress, not plant myself in a garden full of it. I've mostly been stressing about how jayden is taking my absence. she's either distraught or care free, and i'm not sure leaving her with mom and dad was the best idea on my part. i also needed to get my mind off of chandler, which has been impossible for the past few days. i'm keeping myself distant from him, in hopes of making both his and my feelings for each other slowly fade away. so far it hasn't worked for me, but i can only wonder about him.

i grin as i realize i have reached my destination. i make my way down the rusted train tracks, balancing myself on the edge as i pretend to be a gymnast walking across the thin beam. i spread my arms out wide for balance, already feeling my mind slowly de-stressing.

after walking down the tracks a little more, the tracks make a turn, but in front of me is an abandoned business building. some of the windows are shattered, giving it more of a spooky effect. i grip the bag tighter within my fingers before forcing myself to continue on.

leaves crunch underneath my feet, and the wind blows the trees peacefully around me. oh, the loveliness of autumn. the leaves on the trees turn their true colors, making nature such a beautiful place to be at this time of year.

i replace my stress with creativity, letting all the negative vibes exit my body and inviting the positive ones in.

i'm now at the back of the abandoned building, biting the inside of my cheek as i shake the first can of paint. an idea enters my head and i push my index finger down on the can, making a bright red power ooze out of the nozzle and make its permanent mark on the cement wall.

my brain lets go of all thoughts and i intensely focus on my newly found expression of art. i used to draw all over my walls, making cute little doodles underneath my bed. my entire bedroom was once overflowing with sketches and painting that i had conjured up.