Samantha's POV
"Dear Harry,
First of all, thank you. I can never thank you enough for what you did for me, you're literally my hero. You don't understand how hard this is for me actually, even though I've known you for so little you've marked me (not in a bad way due to the last event). The day we first met I really thought you were the best human alive, I still believe that btw. Leaving is never easy. But the time comes when we must move on. Leaving is never easy. Especially for those who have nowhere else to go. I want to apologize for writing this letter rather than confronting you personally about how I feel. It's not because I'm a coward or anything of that nature but because it's hard to talk to you about anything serious. The thing is that whenever I'm with you, I'm not myself and tend to lose focus on what is important and forget what I'm going to say. And I know that if I told you that I'm leaving, you'll find a way to convince me to stay and I don't want that. Writing this letter perhaps maybe the hardest thing I've ever done. But this is the only way I could get closure and finally let you move on with your life. I've made a lot mistakes in my life, some that I regret and others I don't (I regret most of them) and in this case it's a mistake that I don't regret, I mean, coming with you and deciding to stay. Even though you were just a temporary place holder in my life, you opened my eyes to a whole different side of me, I never knew I could be happy, I thought all that spark in my life was gone, that I will never be able to smile or laugh again, but of course you proved me wrong. You're such a special person Harry, NEVER LET ANYONE KILL THAT SPARKLE, because it is unique, YOU ARE unique. As crazy as it sounds, I really did fall for you (I know I've known only for like two weeks but you know love comes when you're not expecting it) and it's something I won't ever regret because you gave me moments of happiness when I needed it. I guess I should probably thank you for those wonderful moments. About what happened tonight, I think you need a proper explanation. I am a drug-addict, this is why I think you should never look for me again. I'm a waste of space and a waste of time, and yes, I really do feel that way. I'm not trying to be overdramatic. I tried, I really tried to be strong for you Harry. There is a thin line between a moment of clarity and a moment of weakness- though one moment seems infinitely longer. Although I was strong all the time I was here, and by strong I mean staying out of trouble, keeping a smile on my face, being hopeful for the future, my strength began to dwindle. I collapsed and drowned in my sorrow. The I-can't-breathe-i-feel-lightheaded-gasping-am-i-going-to-die kind of cry overcame me. It came to me. And I couldn't stop it. I went to get some drugs but I didn't have the money and I couldn't spend your money, tbh I came here to take it, but you showed up. I realized that all that anxiety just vanished when I woke up and saw you. Then it hit me, you were the distraction, you were the reason I wasn't feeling like I was about to die, at that moment you were my drug. I know it sounds cliché and all that, but I mean it. This is why I have to leave, because I can't get, it's not worth it because I'm not worth saving. Gracias por todo, te amo"
When I was done I noticed some tear drops on the paper, I wiped them off and left the letter on the bed, along with the box of money. I was leaving for good, for Harry. When I was writing the letter I realized how important he was for me. In such a short time he became a big part of my life, the best part of my life and I don't think anyone could replace that. I should never have cared. But I did care, I cared a lot. And I still fucking care. I can't drag him with me, he isn't welcome to the void, there is nothing there and he doesn't deserve it. I wiped the tears running down my eyes and close the door, leaving Harry behind. Leaving my happiness behind.
A/N
I KNOW ITS SHORT!! Gonna post the next one soon today! Hope you liked it!! And thank you for voting!!! It means a lot! Eva out
YOU ARE READING
The A Team
FanfictionI always thought that if I died no one would notice, no one will cry for me. I was alone in this world, being a complete waste of space, no one seemed to aknowledge me before I met him. He is hope, he is light, he is love.
