Nobody Cares. (One Direction Fan Fiction)

Mirrors

Author's Note

I changed the accident. Now it's of an accident I made up. Nothing bad.

~Monday, April 15th~

{Belle's POV}

Tears welled up in my eyes as I looked at my reflection. A black lace dress fit tightly around my upper body. Showing every curve, everything I'm insecure about. It's hard enough I have to go to my brothers funeral, now I have to feel insecure while doing it.

I'm already insecure about seeing everyone now that they know I attempted suicide. Now adding onto how I look is even worse. Luckily I don't have any zits thanks to the magic called Proactive.

But now I have to face my grandparents, who hate me, and a bunch of Scott's friends. And at their age I know they'll make fun of me.

My fingers subconsciously rubbed over the scars from yesterday as I stared at myself in the mirror. I hate mirrors. Every mirror makes me feel like shit. I clenched my hand around my wrist to stop myself from grabbing something sharp and cutting. God, I hate being like this.

Having the urge to cut every time I feel self conscious. Every time I see someone prettier then I am. Every time I go on twitter.

"Belle! C'mon! We're going to be late!" Niall called as he pounded on my bedroom door. I sighed, grabbing my phone, shoving it into my dress pocket, and walking out.

The first person I made eye contact with was Liam as I stepped out of mine and Niall's room. We haven't spoken since Friday. Especially after yesterday he has been distant. I think he's avoiding me. To be truthful, we're both avoiding each other.

I'm scared of him. I'm scared that if I get him mad he'll hurt me. Just like my mom.

Scared.

That's a word I use a lot. An emotion I can't keep control of. It's like it's controlling me instead.

"Someone looks beautiful." Louis commented, giving me a wink. I blushed even though I know he's lying. I truly want to believe him, but I don't.

"Stop talking about yourself Lou." I tried to joke, but my pain broke through as I spoke some of the words. It took all I could not to crack a tear.

They all look better then I do. All of their clothes fit nicely onto their bodies while mine make me look fat. Being self conscious sucks.

"Awe, you're so sweet." Louis said, a tint of blush appearing on his cheeks. I shook my head as a knock on the door filled the room. "Belle, why don't you get it?" Harry offered, a mischievous grin plastered to his lips.

I furrowed my eye brows in confusion, then walked towards to door. Since I'm to short, and the boys obviously know who it is, I opened the door.

My heartbeat stopped when I saw him in front of me. No. Why the hell is he here?

"Go away Emerson." I tried to slam the door in his face but he shoved his foot between the door frame and door. "Can we talk? The boys invited me to come to the funeral."

All with my heartbeat the rest of my body froze. My head became lightheaded and all I could feel was chest moving up and down from breathing.

Why would they invite him? Shit. They probably think we're still dating. I knew I should've told them!

Fuck my life.

"I don't want to talk and I especially don't want you going to my brothers funeral." I spoke coldly, keeping my volume low so the boys wouldn't hear me. It's not their fault that he's here. Well it is but they didn't know better.