Clandestine Wishes (Dramione Fanfic)

The hardest day

"Loving you is my finest hour, leaving you, the hardest day of my life..." The hardest day of my life by The Corrs

Hermione stirred after long hours of continued sleep; she opened her puffy eyes and groggily searched the room. She licked her parched lips and turned her face to the side, she noticed a familiar red head woman sleeping uncomfortably on the small couch near her bed. She sighed, she remembers everything now; her foolishness, her desperation and selfishness. She lifted her hand and looked at the wound that almost ended her life, "You've completely lost your plot," she mumbled. She moved her other hand to her neck and wrapped her fingers around the pendant, clutching it like it was her life line.

"You're awake."

She moved her gaze to Ginny and saw her glaring at her, "H - hey" she croaked, shame and guilt gnawing painfully at her gut.

Ginny stood up and made her way towards her; she sat on her bedside and pulled her into a tight hug. "I'm glad you're okay but I'm bloody mad - really mad."

"I'm sorry Ginny...I really am..." she whispered as tears started welling in her eyes.

Ginny pulled back, "I know everything, Harry told me" she said. She gently gathered Hermione's hand to her lap, "I know it was hard seeing him sweetheart, but this?" she sighed. "Tell me, what happened?"

She hung her head as her shoulders shook, "We - we're over" she sobbed.

"You broke up years ago...I don't understand" Ginny furrowed her brows in confusion. "Why did you break up in the first place, you really haven't been clear about that."

She wiped the tears that managed to escape her eyes, "I was the one who broke up with him, it was my fault" she sniffed. "I - I left him Gin, I broke us because I was not brave enough to fight for what we have. He kept on telling me that he'll never leave me, but then I never knew where his loyalty really lies. I got scared. The war is looming over our heads and his parents - you know how much he loves them."

"You didn't ask him?"

She shook her head, "I wouldn't make him choose between me and them."

"So you just ended it," Ginny sighed.

"Yes," she replied.

Ginny squeezed her hand, her eyes full of understanding. "What happened to Hogwarts, Hermione?"

She looked away and cleared her throat, "I - I saw him at Hogwarts, I never thought I'd see him there. He was standing in the exact same spot where I broke us" she croaked. "He - he approached me and acted really cordial, it as if we're long time friends who never lost contact, he was so friendly and it made me feel so guilty." She leaned back on her pillow and wiped her cheeks for what feels like the hundredth time, "I couldn't do it, I can't act like there's nothing wrong when we both knew that it was all a lie. I apologized and ran away like the coward I am and then I realized that I dropped my necklace."

Ginny pointed towards her neck, "That necklace?"

"Yeah,"

"That's the one he gave you for Christmas, right?"

She nodded tearfully, "It's the last thing I have of him and I can't lose, I just can't" she admitted.

"Go on, what happened next?" Ginny encouraged.

She turned to her side and curled herself like a fetus, "I received a letter the next day, it was unsigned but I knew it was him because of the owl. I went back to meet him, but he didn't even want to face me. He made me sit facing the Lake while he stood behind me," she paused as he voice broke. She cleared her throat and ignored the tears that kept on leaking from her eyes, "He - he asked me why I still kept the necklace after all these years, but I couldn't answer. Gods Gin, I wanted to tell him how much I'm still desperately in love with him, but I can't hurt him anymore - I refuse to. He looked like he already moved on and he just needed closure, so I kept my mouth shut..."