He's The Beauty And I'm The Beast

Chapter 12

I open my eyes slowly and stare at the roof. I couldn't believe my dream, or was it a nightmare? I didn't wake up screaming but I just felt like I was falling down a black abyss. I felt serenity I also felt peace and calm. As in that dream drain every feeling I had... I felt empty. The real word I was looking for is numb I couldn't feel anything my mind just went in blank. I was asking myself if I ever consider that, but I think I did because then I wouldn't have that dream or nightmare. I still couldn't decide which it was. I remember the panic, the fear, the pain and most of all the desperation. It was all triple in that dream the feeling got worst but when I jump the bridge I just felt one thing and that was relief. I would never commit suicide because I know that I am lucky I even survive the attack. Even if my life is horrible and just plain painful; I know people out there have it worse than me. I am grateful for Roxan and Ryan; to be honest I wouldn't know what be of me if I didn't have them. I also got Brandon but I am not sure if I can trust him just yet. He is kind of bipolar I am going to extra careful around him. For all I know this is just a prank it could even be a dare. I look at the clock and it was four in the morning. I couldn't go back to sleep after that and is Saturday I don't have school.

I look around my room where I have my sketching book and all my painting supplies. I saw the entire portrait collection around my room but my favorite was the one I did earlier, the one of Crystal. I smile as I remember our conversation. Then another one caught my eye...it was the one I started and haven't continue. The one of Ryan and I. It was just missing me... I didn't want to continue that one yet. So I decided to start another one. I was thinking of the dream or nightmare whatever you want to name it. I went and grab a pencil and started sketching. After I was finish sketching it was already six in the morning. I was still working on it. I got some paint and started painting it. When I was done with my painting the clock was flashing 8:42 am in it illuminated green color. I look at my painting happy of how it turns out to be. It was the San Francisco Bridge; it was night time the moon was full but it colors was bloody red. On the edge of the bridge was standing a girl. The wind was blowing her hair making it cover her face. You could see teardrops dropping from her face. As you look at sky it was completely dark not one star and the moon was creating a spotlight on the girl. When you look at the bridge there was fill with people; the people were screaming at the girl. When you see the water you see dark almost black water. Inside the water you could see things that you see in nightmares; hideous and repulsing monster. In the water you could see words full of hatred.

Fat! Ugly! Worthless! Whore! Slut! Cutter! Freak! Hideous! Unimportant! Whale!

The words continue and just got nastier by the second. The thing is that at the end of the shallow waters you could see a bright light.

I look at my painting feeling a little better of myself. How I wish I could take art as one of my class. I couldn't because art was only taken by the really talented student; you have to submit a sketch, painting or and a sculpture. I never have the bravery to enter one of my arts. I was too scared I get rejected or make fun of. So I never enter anything and now I am taking theater instead. Which I hate because I am to shy or when I try to act everyone just judge me and start insulting me. The teacher at least is nice and doesn't make me act in front of everyone and just gives me written exams. I heard my door opening and I jump back scared. When I look up I saw my brother. He was just wearing some pants and was shirtless.

He scratches the back of his neck.

"I heard some noise and I thought I check it out." He looks up and meets my eyes with made me look down. I heard him gasp and when I look up I saw him staring all my paintings then he look at me cover in paint and the one I recently made.

"That...you...wow...amazing" he was so stunned he couldn't even make a proper sentence. He step forward and look the one I made just now.

"Don't touch it is steal wet..." I whisper and he look at it and then at me.