GONER

20 • Confess Confess

A/N: Chapter 20 oh my god I'm freakin out.

Keep in mind that I've never written smut before, so when the time comes, I'm going to try my best.

***

"Josh?"

"Yeah?"

"Why do you like me?"

It was almost two in the morning, and I could feel him prop himself up on his elbow, his figure slightly illuminated in the moonlight coming from the window. I could almost feel his eyes on me in the dark, and his hair was ragged, even though I knew he hadn't gone to sleep. "Do you have a day or two? Because that's about how long it's going to take for me to finish explaining everything." He said gently, voice raspy and almost silent in the dark. Quiet and low and cautious, because his brothers were home, and so was his mom now.

"You're sweet," I breathed, shaking my head to myself to attempt to clear my thoughts as I shuffled around, trying not to touch him.

"I'm just being honest with you." He said gently, his hand reaching to find mine. "Now come cuddle with me."

"You want me to cuddle with you." I stated, shock coating my voice. It wasn't something I could hide, though, and so I just swallowed thickly, burying my face in the covers even further. My body was warm and tense and soft with his only a few inches away.

"Yes."

Without waiting for me to respond to him, his hands reached out to grab lightly at my waist, and he pulled me towards him in one silent, fluid movement. It felt strange, to be with him like this. With only a handful of layers separating our skin. My shirt, my pants, and his pants, and that was it. He asked me, before we went to sleep, or whatever this is, if it was alright if he slept with nothing covering the expanse of his torso, and I just nodded, and now I'm paying the agonizing price. His hand on my waist and my back against his bare skin.

It was very taunting. Having him here and not being allowed to have him fully. Or maybe I was, and I wasn't using it to my advantage. But, I'm not sure of anything as of right now, besides the fact that I sound like a lunatic thinking about his chest so intently. So I tried to force myself to stop, even though it didn't work that well. I could almost still feel the rain water pouring down on me, along with the feelings I had, that were spinning completely and utterly out of my control.

"You could move closer, you know," he muttered, and I could feel his lips by my ear. It sent a thrill down my spine, and I tried to ignore the small shiver that passed through my body. "I don't bite," he continued. "Well, sometimes, but that's occasional."

"You're an animal," I replied, and he laughed lightly, the sound musical and gentle.

"You wish," he breathed, reaching to press a kiss to the small space under my jaw.

Rolling my eyes, I leaned subconsciously into his warm, strong hold, and tried to be much calmer and steadier than I really was. Because I was honestly freaking out. His lips were cold and beautiful, and I huffed gently, shaking him off of me. "Stop it."

"Make me," he hummed, vibrations traveling through my collar bone with a sense of electricity. That's what he was, honestly. He was pure energy moving through and past me in wave after wave after wave, and he wasn't letting me breathe.

It's like drowning with no water, and I didn't know what to do about it any more than I knew what to do about it yesterday.

"I would if I could," I lied, or maybe I wasn't lying. "Probably." If I had it my way, I'd let him touch me like this forever.