Unhappily Married ✓

26. Goodbye

"Marriages are like fingerprints; each one is different and each one is beautiful."—Maggie Reyes

As I put the last piece of my clothing into the cardboard box, I sigh and sit down on the bed.

Tomorrow morning, I am moving out of this house and as much as I try to convince myself that I'll deal with this pain, I know I actually can't. I clearly remember the day I moved in as if it were yesterday. I used to think I'd get rid of Todd after a month, but little did I know, I'd end up falling for him all over again. We've been through many ups and downs in our relationship, but this time my heart's literally falling to pieces.

I pick up the photo frame from the bedside table and run my hand over its wooden frame. When Todd wasn't home yesterday, I took this frame from the basement. I don't think Todd and I will see each other often after I move out, so I need something to keep his memories.

A few tears roll down my cheeks, but I don't bother wiping my eyes.

I am in love with him.

But I'm going to lose him forever.

And it's only my fault.

"Hey, Stella, what are you doing?"

Immediately, I put the frame into the cardboard box and wipe my eyes before Todd enters the bedroom.

"Um, nothing much...I was just packing my stuff."

He nods.

I force a smile.

"Well, the weather is crisp and I made some hot chocolate for us both, so if you're done—"

"Just give me a minute."

He smiles, "Okay."

*****

As I close the main door, I find Todd sitting on the porch steps with his back to me. Shuddering, I roll down the sleeves of my sweatshirt and walk over to him.

The evening begins turning murky as the sky gets entirely obscured by the clouds.

"Hey," I say.

"Hey."

"The weather is pleasant."

A smile spreads across his lips. "Indeed."

Rubbing my cold hands together, I sit down beside him and let out a shaky breath.

"Here you go; my special hot chocolate."

The moment I wrap my hands around the mug, its warmth flows into my numb fingers, and I take a long slow breath, the rich chocolaty fragrance helping me to unwind after a long day.

"You're welcome."

I chuckle, blowing onto the hot drink.

"I like this sound."

I look up to meet his eyes and he flashes me a toothy smile.

All of a sudden, the wind picks up and the rain starts drumming wildly on the roof.

I'll miss Todd so much. I'll miss his smile, his laugh, his dry humor, his cooked food...everything. The thought of leaving him tomorrow really tears me apart, but I know I've to gain control over my feelings or this pain will soon become unbearable.

I wish I could I tell him how much I love him, but I'm not strong enough right now.

A sudden gust of wind whips my hair into my eyes and I immediately tuck an unruly lock behind my ear.