Lost Life (Fairy Tail)

Chapter 31- Secret

Chapter 31

Secret

Disclaimer: I do not own Fairy Tail or its characters, only my own OC's and ideas

.:+:.

Frea lay back on the bench she was usually at near the back of the guild hall. Her arms were crossed behind her head and she closed her eyes, listening with a small smile to all the talking and laughing going around the hall. She could hear Levy talking to Gajeel about some of the things she had learned, and she could tell, even if she wasn't looking at him, that Gajeel was listening to her in earnest. Near the front of the Guild Natsu was talking to Lucy with Happy nearby, while Gray and Erza were talking with each other not far off. She had left the Infirmary yesterday afternoon, and she had dragged herself out of bed to be here at the Guild Hall in the morning, she had been laying there for almost the entire day now.

It was getting harder to do anything, she felt drained more each day, and a slight pain in her chest was starting to rise up every now and again. But even all of that wouldn't keep her from lying here, listening to her Family laugh and talk all around her. It was all so familiar... she opened her eyes half-way and stared up at the ceiling.

She had been trying to think of a way of telling them she was going to die.

Every time she thought about it, she only ended up going in circles and not knowing what to say. For once in her life, she couldn't work up the nerve to do something. All the fights she'd been in, all the battles... all the heartbreak that she had gone through while being apart of this Guild... They all seemed so easy compared to the realization she needed to at least tell Master Makarov that she was going to die soon.

Even bearing the extreme amount of pain that Kasumi had put her through, suddenly seemed so much easier than working up the nerve to just tell them.

She closed her eyes again and let out a soft sigh, damnit all... why does life have to turn out this way? She shifted her head to the side a little as the sound of approaching footsteps reached her ears.

"Hey Frea." A voice asked and she opened her eyes to glance over at Lucy. She gave the blonde a smile and sat up slowly, even that was a little hard to do at the moment.

"Hey." She replied and Lucy cast a quick glance at Natsu and Erza, who were waiting at the front door with Gray.

"Natsu wanted to know if you wanted to come along on a mission with us?" Lucy invited and Frea gave her a sad smile, before shaking her head.

"No thanks. You guys go ahead, and good luck." Frea replied and Lucy nodded, waving at her as she left the Guild Hall. She watched the group of people leave, frowning slightly and letting out yet another sigh. She had decided not to go any more missions, they probably wouldn't turn out very well in her condition. She stayed at the Guild for another hour or more, before leaving the Hall and heading up to Fairy Hills. Once she was inside her room she closed and locked the door, and changed into a pair of black Pajama shorts, and a grey tank top.

She pulled the hairband out of her hair and let it fall around her shoulders, before slowly walking up to her window and opening it. She settled down crossed-legged in the window sill and placed her hands on either side of her, palms open on the smooth wood of the sill. The sun had already set as she made her way up to Fairy Hills and a half-moon was rising in the sky. A slight breeze blew over magnolia and she smiled down at the lit up figure of her Guild Hall down in the town.

Her eyes narrowed in a sad frown and she felt two small tears appear at the corner of her eyes. She hated crying, she rarely ever did it, and it just made her feel worse that she couldn't stop the silent tears from rolling down her face slowly. She wasn't crying for the fact that she was dying... no that wasn't it.

The faces of her Family flashed before her eyes, smiling, laughing...

She was crying, because she couldn't bear the thought of losing them... Never seeing their smiling faces again. It seemed to selfish at the moment, that she was worried about never seeing them again. She clenched her fists into balls at her sides, it made it worse when the image of them sad and crying came to her. She felt like some sort of Monster to think she would make them go through the pain of losing her, again. She had seen how happy they were when she came back the first time, after they had thought she was dead.

She had come back then, for whatever reason.

Was this fate's cruel plan? Was she saved, brought back to her family, to make them happy... Only to break their hearts again?

"Damn this all..." She hissed. "The last thing I want to do is make them sad... So how the hell am I going to even tell them?" She growled quietly. She winced as the small twinges of pain she had been having in her chest, suddenly intensified and she coughed up small flecks of blood into her hand.

She was getting worse.