His Submissive Omega (boyxboy) Old Version

Chapter 59: February

~February's POV~
Dec doesn't blame me for what I did to him. For all I've done to him. But I can't help but best myself up. I started... Taking my anger out on myself. You know? Yeah. I don't like talking about it. But Dec doesn't know it yet.
"Doesn't know what?" Dec asked from behind me.
I tensed.
"N-Nothing..." I said.
He sighed heavily.
"I know." He whispered.
"About what?" I asked, nervousness in my voice.
"Your wrists. Your legs. Your sides." Dec said.
I felt tears prickle at my eyes.
"I let you down." I said.
Dec shook his head.
"No. You're just at a weak point right now. It happens to all Alphas." Dec said.
"Do they all cut?" I asked.
"Some do. Depends on how close to rock bottom they are." Dec said.
I looked down.
"I'm a mess. I'm a horrible Alpha. I'm a terrible mate. My wolf is a dick. I'm a monster. I can't do anything right." I said.
Dec kissed me.
"You are none of those things. Is your wolf a dick? Yes. Those other things? They are not true. This whole pack loves you. Do you angry and scary at ones? Yes. We all do. As for a 'terrible mate' never. I wouldn't dream of a better mate. Because every time I do dream of one, I see you." Dec said.
I smiled.
"How can you still love me? After all I've don't to you?" I asked.
"Easy. You're my brother and my mate. I loved you once, love you still, always have, always will." Dec said.
Actually, I feel happier than I was about three seconds ago.
"Now listen here... I know you're sad and hurt. But I know those emotions are driven by guilt for what your dick of a wolf did. But I've accepted what he's done to me. And you should too. There's no reason to hate him. I don't. I stopped him from going haywire on our pack. Or I helped. Sort of. By satisfying his needs, I also satisfied yours. Now look, don't be guilty anymore. You've no reason to be. The guilt has driven you to cutting. And we simply can't have that. Does the pack know? Yes. Do they understand why? Yes. I've told them. We're all worried about you. Packs hate seeing their Alphas upset like you are. They like seeing their Alphas loud and proud. Like you used to be. Did your wolf use your body to hurt me? Yes he did. Do I care? Not at all. Because you want to know the best thing?" Dec asked.
I looked at him.

"I'm pregnant." Dec said.

A huge megawatt smile broke out on my face.
"You look like the Cheshire Cat from Alice In Wonderland." Dec said.
I nodded.
"You-You are?" I asked.
"Mhm." Dec said.
I hugged him. He hugged me back.
"Here's the mate I know and love. You and our baby are all I need to make Dec here happy. Throw a pack in the mix to make the Luna side of me happy. We a'ight." Dec said.
Him and that language.
"I love you. And I love our unborn baby." I said.
"I know you do. Does this make you a tad bit happier?" Dec asked.
I nodded.

"So much happier." I said.
I kissed him.
"Come on! Let's go out. Spend the day together. Just the, technically, three of us." Dec said.
"Alright. Let me get something from my office first." I said.
Dec nodded.

~December (Dec's) POV~
I know what he went into his office for. His knife. I hope this good news will make him get rid of it. Or motivate and encourage him to get rid of it. The guilt is eating him alive. Oh shit! I just realized something. He might feel more guilty now. He knew I wanted to be at least 22 to have children. And I'm only 17 and am pregnant. Oh no. Am I thrilled to be pregnant? YES! I love children. I've always wanted to be a dad. I followed February to his, er, our office. I saw him frantically looking around for it. It. I took it from his office. Not knowing how he was going to take the news. He took it very well. Which I am happy for. Trust me on that one, my fine furry friends. He looked up and saw me.
"Where is it?" He asked, out of breath.
He's panicking. He's relied on it for so damn long. I should've had this talk with him sooner. This part is my fault.
"Where is what?" I asked.
I'm playing dumb. I'm good at that.
"My-My-My thing..." February said.
He never called it a knife. He called it his 'thing.' My poor baby.
"I don't know." I said.
He started twitching. Oh fuck me. He has schizophrenia. Only one of our family members had it. Add PTSD in the mix and you got a cocktail. He must've saw something before we left Deimos and Demos's pack.
"You have PTSD. And schizophrenia. What did you see that gave you the PTSD?" I asked.
He looked at me terrified. He started twitching more. See now... When wolves get a PRSD, anxiety or panic attack, we get them bad. And their mates are the only ones to stop it. Medicine won't help. Their mates are the only medicine they will ever need. He started whimpering. I shoved my way into his mind.

And I didn't like what I saw...