Close My Eyes.
Then, Closetland.
And of course Stardust was always there.
Not sure when it entered my mental world.
And yet, strangely,
I am not devastated.
Not sure why the lack of devastation.
Not that I want to be devastated..
but yeah, wondering
I'm at peace.
Perhaps it's age
the now-common death of close friends and older celebs
normal occurrences now.
Younger folks wonder
why the grief for Bowie:
they've never heard of him.
At the same time, other actors much older
are dying or have died
--90 year olds etc--
whom those now mourning Bowie
never heard of.
So yes a daily occurrence,
at my age.
At my age, death is numbing.
Once in a great while
there is this terrifying squeal
a strange overflow of grief
from my own mouth
from my own heart
which leaves me amazed.
And I think:
how strange this grief!
I didn't know this death
would devastate me so much.
I cried so much when Orson Welles died
I thought my heart would break.
