Heartbreak Girl (Ashton Irwin)

Chapter 12

My throat went dry, I couldn't think, I couldn't speak. It was like my whole world stopped, time felt like it was literally standing still. I felt my cheeks heat up, trailing down all the way down to my neck.

"Say something, anything" he said in a more soft tone, stepping towards me. I stepped back, shaking my head.

"I-I... Why? Why now?" I croaked, almost a squeak. I couldn't muster up enough energy to sound the least bit intimidating.

It felt like eternity that I waited for his reply, my hands shaking and sweating slightly. I clenched them into fists to hide my nervousness, my mind swirling with thousands of questions that I really didn't have the answer for. And the thought of that drove me insane, not knowing what's happening. Not knowing the answer. Not knowing the key to all of my confusion.

"I don't know" he finally admitted, turning around and walking to the wall, his hands supporting him up. He leaned against the wall, his arms keeping him from falling.

"I wanted to tell you, I really did. But you seemed so happy with . . . Him" he said quickly, malice dripping in the word 'him'.

"Who, Marcus?" I asked curiously, tugging at my hair.

"Santa" he joked, but that just infuriated me.

"This isn't time for joking Ashton! You confessed your love to me just like a minute ago, nothing to joke about" I snapped, causing him to let out a dramatic sigh.

"I know, and it was a mistake. A complete mistake, I'm sorry" he mumbled, peeking over his shoulder to look at me. I gulped, turning away.

"We can't leave this not spoken about, we can't just brush this off as nothing. My best friend is in love with me, but I have a boyfriend and I love him and - oh god" I said, "Marcus is going to kill you!" I hissed.

"Who said Marcus had to know?" He wailed quite loud, "I'd rather have him not punch my face in"

"I can't not tell him! This has a lot to do with him too, you know" I crossed my arms over my chest.

"How?!" He cried out, finally turing around to face me.

"Because someone just told HIS girlfriend that they're in love wit her! We're you not just in this conversation or . . . " I trailed off, growing more anxious.

"Why can't we pretend this never happened?" He reasoned, pressing his lips together.

"That's out of the question, don't even ask that anymore" I brushed that off, making him roll his eyes.

"It's not that big of a deal El," he looked desperate to go back to normal, and a part of me felt awful.

"It is though, I can't forget this. I just can't . . . Every time I see you I'm going to think of what just happened, how you love me, how you can't love without me . . . " I mumbled, taking deep breaths to calm myself down.

"Then let me handle this, I'll figure something out" he chewed the inside of his cheek, carding his fingers through his light hair.

"No, that's not going to happen" I said, shaking my head. "I just . . . Maybe we should just forget about this" I said, looking down and then back up.

"Are you sure?" He asked quietly. I nodded, sighing.

"We're going to have to. I mean, I love Marcus. I love him, I do, but you're my best friend. I can't loose you" I said softly, slowly taking tiny steps until I was in front of him.

"Just try to forget it, alright? Lets start off from a clean slate, I mean, how hard could it be to forget about it?"

--

Turns out it's hard as fuck. It's all I've been thinking about since Friday. Even after the beach, after school, after spending everyday with him like usual, I still couldn't forget. And every time I would forget, it's maybe at the max for 5 minutes. That aggravates the hell out of me, I've never been so stuck on something.

Marcus has noticed a change out of me too, but he didn't seem too concerned. Not as concerned as I would like him to be.

"Hey!" I felt my body being crushed behind me, the familiar black framed glasses hitting my cheek.

"Hey Marcus" I said quietly, obviously not very interested. He slumped slightly, but didn't pry too much onto the topic. He came around to my side, his arm wrapping around my neck as we walked to lunch.

"So I've been noticing . . . " he trailed off. C'mon baby, just say it. Say you're worried about me.

"Did you loose weight?" He asked. I sighed sadly, looking down at my stomach. Well at least he was somewhat concerned?

"5 pounds" I muttered under my breath. I haven't eaten much since Friday.

"You look great!" He exclaimed, kissing my cheek. I wasn't having it today, my mind was on bigger things.

"Thanks" I muttered, wetting my lips before I bit them.

"I'll see you later, I have to use the bathroom" I said before wriggling out of his grip and making a run for the bathroom.

Once I got into one of the stalls, I locked it, taking out my phone.

'You : this isn't working'

I waited for his reply, sitting on the disgusting floor. I didn't care though, my mind was on more important things.

'From Ashy : I know'

'You : we have to figure something out. Like, now.'

'From Ashy : I figured. Stop by today. After school like always.'



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Hello lovelies! Thank you guys so so so much for your support and reads and votes, I'm surprised how much you guys like this. It means so much to me and I love you guys so much.

I haven't spellchecked it, bare (bear?) with me

Anyway, so I did start another fanfiction. It's a Harry Styles one, and I suggest you shouldn't read it if you aren't a directioner. Sorry if you don't like One Direction, but I love them.

So yeah, check that out if you'd like! Would mean a lot.

1.6k+ reads. That's amazing. Thank you!