Mario Kart (Phan Smut)

5~ This Whole Gay Thing

About time I updated

~december vibes oooh~

*Phil's POV*

"Dan, you giant meme! Get over here, I can't get this tree together!" I yelled at the couch behind me. "Phil, I'm in my sofa crease. I'm not moving, not you for, not for the end of the world," Dan said back, deadpan. He was looking at his screen, tumblr reflecting in his eyes. His fringe was pushed out of his face, and it was curly. He hated it like thar, but I loved it. I finally got him comfortable to leave it be around me, and I'm glad I did. My boyfriend looked so beaver dam cute like this. I sighed and turned back to work on the tree. "Dan, I need a strong, muscular man to hell me with this. Come here," I purred. Dan didn't budge. "John Cena is in America, babe," he said back. I could see phan art in his eyes. Nerd. "Which is why you need to come help me!" I threw a bauble at him. "Ow!" Dan complained like a feminine ocelot on helium. "Move off your lazy butt and help!" I said strictly. "Fine," Dan finally moved out of his crease. The indent he left never really did go away, so we just have a Dan-sized crevice in out couch permanently. He sat down next to me. "What first?" Dan asked. I couldn't say anything. I was speechless. His face was gently illuminated by the Christmas lights, making his irises look the literal color of chocolate dipped in honey. My gaze wavered to his lips. Those pale pink lips. The ones I fall my own. I started to lean in.

*Dan's POV*

He slowly started to lean in. My insides began to flutter even before we kissed. "Phil," I murmured when he was mere inches from my face. He grunted back a 'hmm'. "We're going nunder," I spoke softly, gently kissing him. I leaned back, allowing Phil to press against me on the floor. I wrapped my arms around him. I slowly worked my hands down to his arse, which I softly caressed. Our faces were swaying together as we kissed, as if we were listening to What A Catch, Donnie. I pulled out of the kiss. Phil pouted a little. "What? My pullout game is strong," I said back, taking my shirt off. Phil laughed a bit too and took his shirt off.

God, he was so white.

After my eyes adjusted to the literal light reflecting off his white skin, I realized something. Only angels have white skin. I ran my hand softly down Phil's suprisingly present abdomen. Phil grabbed me by the back and pulled me in close, making us kiss again. As we were kissing, I slowly peeled off my skinny jeans, leaving me in just my underwear, Phil doing the same. I pulled out again. "Phil, this is going like at least 100 different fanfictions," I said, kinda upset. "So?" Phil asked, adjusting his underwear strap. "It's so unoriginal! We need to do something they'd never expect!" I said, standing up.

*Phil's POV*

Oh no. Serious director Dan was coming, and I was legitimately scared.

*Dan's POV*

I clicked my fingers and pointed at Phil. "A dance party," I said. Phil looked worried. "They'll never guess it coming. Besides, dicks always look funny flopping around. I took off my underwear, and took Phil's off too. His dick hit me in the face as I did so. Awkward. I grabbed my phone and turned on Drake's Hotline Bling. Phil decided to give up and we both did the movements to the song. I then realized that plot convenience wasn't always conveneint. "Phil, I've changed my mind. I don't care if it's like thousands of fanfictions, but I want you inside me," I said. Walking over to Phil. Phil smiled. "I thought you'd never ask," Phil said, grabbing my penis.

I got down on the floor, ready for Phil to join me. He had gone to go get the lube. "Dan!" I heard a voice call. "What?" I called back. "I dropped the lube and spilled it!" I facepalmed.

One trip to Boots and a half an hour later, we were both exhausted, but had lube. "I'm not in the mood anymore," Phil said. We were both lying on the couch completely naked, Phil playing with the bottle of lube. "Not here either," I said. "We're not too good at this whole gay thing yet," Phil said, causing us both to laugh. I rested my head on Phil's shoulder. He leaned down and kissed my head.

Okay sorry this was so short and bad, I want to try to ease back into this story after what happened. My messages are always open of you have a request or just want to talk, btw. So I really hope you don't mind this for a chapter. Sorry. I'll update really soon though.

Till next time, my awkward children.