The Funeral Style

Chapter Eighteen

Thank you for reading, I say that a lot but I still mean it every time.

Please do not stop because I will miss you not as much as I miss Jesus when he arose from the grave and descended into Heaven, but I'll still miss you.

Come back Jesus pls we are stupid

Chapter Eighteen

I sat in the school's lunchroom, watching Maggie scarf her food down as if it were her first meal in ages. I glanced down at my own tiny portion of vegetables and rice, and I sighed. 

Maggie noticed my hesitance to eat, and spoke up, "I know what you're thinking about, and I want you to stop, it's not healthy."

I gave her a questioning look, "What is it that you know I'm thinking about?"

"Your hot boss." She shoved a spoonful of rice in her mouth, "I mean, he's a man of perfection, not eating isn't going to make you perfect enough to get some." She nudged my shoulder, "If you know what I mean."

My eyes opened wide, and I smacked her a bit too hard, "I don't want to 'get some' ever! That's not what I was thinking about at all."

She rubbed the place where I hit her, and winced, "Well I'm thinking it."

"Well I'm not the pervert you are." I pushed my tray away from me. "God, you have the equivalent sense of humor to a teenage boy."

"Hey, that's sexist!" She shouted, small grains of rice flew from her mouth, "Women can be perverts too, you know."

I rolled my eyes, and stood up, "Whatever, I'm going to class." Before she could even reply, I was already feet away from out table. 

I've been burdened with an annoyed attitude for the past couple of days.  It's not that I meant to be angry at poor Maggie, it's not like she could understand why, either. Honestly, I couldn't even understand why my tolerance has been so low. I just couldn't get it out of my head. That same scene replayed over and over in my brain like an old flick-film. 

Granted, I hated the fact that I was going to be watched over like a five year old by Mr. Parity, but I still got shivers anytime I thought of what he had done.

How he protected me, in his odd, obsessed, way. I wasn't flattered, surely. Just completely intrigued.

I walked into my classroom, and sat at my usual desk. Not even a minute passed, before Maggie appeared, holding an convinced look on her face. I knew what was coming. She never looked like that unless she was ready to speak her mind.

Here it goes.

"Okay." She said as she walked up and slammed her hands down on my desk, "What did I do to make you so pissed?"

I sighed, "Nothing, Maggie. I'm not pissed."

"Then what the hell is wrong with you? You've been walking away from me mid-conversation all week. I mean, I know I'm not pretty, but damn." She suddenly gasped, as if finding her own answer to her question, "I'm not pretty. That Parity guy has got your mind all twisted up, doesn't he? You think I'm too ugly to hang around!"

I stared at her in disbelief, "How on earth could you say something like that? That's completely bizarre, not to mention absolutely stupid."

She crossed her arms over her large torso, making her look even bigger than what she was, "Really? Because ever since you started working with that freak, you have hardly spoke to me." She took out her phone from her bra. I have told her for what seemed like a million times not to store her phone in the midst of her sweaty, watermelon-sized breasts, "You haven't called, or texted me in almost two weeks."

I sunk in my seat. She was right. I haven't thought of her at all these past couple of weeks. In fact, I had nearly forgotten about her, besides our usual meetup here in school, and honestly, it's not like I really paid much attention to her presence anyway.

I gave her an apologetic look, "Sorry, Mag." I said with a sincere tone.

She shrugged her shoulders, making her whole body shake in a jello-type way. "Whatever, you're just lucky I don't have any friends, or I would have dumped you years ago."

"Love you too." I said sarcastically, and watched as she made it over to her seat, and struggled to fit through the pathway through the desks. I giggled, and shook my head. I never understood why she allowed herself to get that big, but in a way, I couldn't imagine her without it.

The teacher soon walked in, and my thoughts began to trail back to Mr. Parity. It couldn't be healthy thinking about him this much.

I do believe I am going insane.

School ended, and Maggie drove me to Parity Cemetery, I was incredibly thankful that I didn't have to drive, but I was also a bit irritated over the fact that the whole half-hour drive consisted of her naming the many reasons why she thinks I should just go to the police so I wouldn't ever have to work with a 'madman' like Parity.

I couldn't tell her about what happened. I couldn't tell her anything that happens here whilst I'm at work, she'd think I was becoming a madman myself.

I walked into the building, after watching Maggie leave. I was greeted by Mr. Parity who wrapped his arm around my shoulders before even saying a word. "Impeccable timing, Miss Adler." He said, with enthusiasm dripping from his tone, "We have special guests who will be here in any minute, so please ready yourself for some excitement."

I looked at him, "Excitement?" His choice of excitement didn't sound to interesting to me. I wondered if it meant a family of criminals. A family of murderers. Some complete monsters with brains.

How exciting. 

"Of course." He said simply, "They are our highest paying guests." He leaned down closer to my ear, and spoke as if it were a secret, "And the most radical, indeed."