I'm afraid to love you back...

Chapter 20

Chapter twenty

When I was released from the hospital I went home with Josh and his family. My few things were already in the guest bedroom that I would be staying in until I turned eighteen.

I stand in front of the mirror of the bathroom and stare at myself. I was completely naked and looking at the endless amount of scars on my body. I was in the hospital for a couple of weeks and a lot of the cuts were healed. The ones on my wrist were on their way but I knew it would be a little longer. I had few bruises on my body anymore.

The therapist I was required to see advised that Josh and his mom watched me closely. He said that i needed to be careful and go to them for help if I felt like harming myself. I still have a hard time with resisting the urge especially when I remember Camille's dead. In about an hour I was supposed to attend her funeral. I honestly didn't want to go.

A lot of news anchors around the area has taken interest in my story. A lot of people were going to show up at her funeral that didn't even know or care about her. I asked the cops to keep any journalists out so that I could have some peace. Jacky planned out the funeral because it was too painful for me.

I quickly get dressed in a black long sleeved dress and leggings. I left my hair down because I knew that this would have to be my final time hiding. After this I was truly going to try and get better. Josh was going to help me and my new friends would be there for me.

At first I was terrified of the concept of love. Josh showed me that it wasn't all bad though. He held me close despite my unstable life and kept me together these last few weeks. I was just so afraid to love him back but now I'm completely free. It was exhilarating.

There was a knock on the door, "Are you almost ready?"

That was Amy's voice. I haven't talked much to Amy mostly because she reminded me of Camille. She was her best friend and it made me heartbroken to see that this little girl had to lose her best friend. Yes I had to lose my sister but I'm not the only one who was affected by Camille's death.

"Yeah. I'll be out in just a moment," I speak through the door and look once more into the mirror.

I imagine as I walk out the door that I'm finally walking into a new life.