Being Marked | ✔️

Locked In

My eyes opened to the right of my very own bed. I raise my body up, feeling pain all over my body. Did I sleep the wrong way or something? My hands ruffled through my hair while I tried opening my eyes wide.

Wait. Hold up. Wasn't I with Xander last night? How did I get to my own bed? So...was it all a dream? I scan through my memory quadruple times and couldn't recall anything with Xander and last night. I sighed in relief. At least the contract is still in tact and I can be with Xander with my one sided love. I really don't mind. But it really did feel nice when Xander confessed to me.

I lay in bed daydreaming about that specific moment and replayed it in my head. Boy I wish we never had that contract. I would be able to love Xander with all my heart. However the contract was the reason why we are so close to each other.

I got out of bed and did the usual morning routines. Everything I did, Xander's words kept popping into my head, giving me both a heartache and excitement. Once I stepped out of my bathroom, I found Xander leaning against the wall with one foot against it and his hands shoved into his black pants pockets. He had a gray beanie and his glasses on for the first time after the first time we met.

I felt my eyes widen when the rest of my body froze. I let out an awkward laugh and walk right past of what I think a mirage. A few steps in and I hear, "so that's my morning welcome?" I stopped in my tracks. Shit he is real! I turned around slowly seeing his smirk on his face. I embarrassed myself in front of Xander. Great.

He walked over, grabbed my arm, dragged me back to my room and locked the door behind me while I was thrown into my own bed.

"Why and how the fuck did you get into my house?" I questioned.

"I met your mother on my way out. She is a really nice lady. I like her." He smiled.

"Then why not go elope with her!" Why the fuck did I just say that? All of a sudden, Xander's face darkened.

"How could you say that when I'm here for you?" He stated calmly.

"Why do you want?"

"I'm still unclear on why you wanted to break up? That's the second god damn time Amy!" He erupted. So that wasn't a dream.

I didn't want to tell him the real reason. That would seem foolish of me. I took a second to form an excuse.

"Don't you fucking think of an excuse!" He caught me on my own act.

"Well we didn't have feelings for each other in the first place. We have the contract and it's only based on sex. Geez, what's the point of breaking up when we didn't even have a relationship. There was no love. So in another words, let's rip the contract. I don't want you anymore". Whatever I said was half true. But Xander please tell me you still want me.

"Is that all? Just because I said I love you? Huh geez!" He let out a laugh as he put his fingers on his forehead and creased his eyebrows. "She's the first person I ever confessed to and this is what I get..." he whispered under his breath which was making me wonder if it's true or he is blackmailing me.

"Are you serious? You never loved anyone before?" I found myself amazed and surprised.

He shook his head no.

"Wait. This could be one of your lies..." I felt a bit disappointed because what I said could be true.

"I AM NOT FUCKING LYING!" He startled me with his yell. I think I felt my heart jump. This was the first time he tried justifying himself with that volume. Now I believe him.

We sat in silence and did everything but make eye contact with each other. He mainly looked out the window while i played with my fingers. It felt like we really did break up and had nothing to say to each other but thats really not the case. I really did not know what to do. The person I long for is right here but I can't make any moves.