Living With No Direction

33. Don't

"Please don't go" Clara begged.

Harry laughed, "I'm so sorry babe, but you know I have to go, " he said placing his hands on her waist.

She engulfed him in a hug, holding on tight.

"But I need you here, we need you, you are going to miss the birth of our first child" Clara cried on his shoulder.

"No, I'm not I'll do the best I can to make it back in time no matter where I am," he told her proudly.

"You know that is not possible Harry, the baby could come at any time and you could be halfway across the world" She pointed out.

Harry sighed, "I know, this isn't fair, management is such arses for not letting you come with us," he said.

"Maybe I will visit you sometime?" she suggested.

"I would love that" Harry smiled before placing his lips on hers.

A few seconds later Zayn broke them up, "Harry we got to go, " he said, Emily not far away a few tears rolling down her face.

"Alright," Harry said, he smiled weakly down at Clara then kissed her forehead, "I love you," he said.

"I love you too, I'm going to miss you so much" Clara sighed.

"I'll miss you more" Harry whispered before detaching from her. Clara gave him one last hug and gave Zayn. The two smiled at their girlfriends before walking away, the rest of the band was already on the plane.

Louis had crossed Clara's mind, she wondered if he was on the plane as well, it had been a while since she had last seen him and she wondered if he was still with Eleanor.

Clara and Emily stood at the glass window watching as the plane took off, heading to England for their first concert of the reunion tour. Clara wished so badly that she was on that plane right next to her boyfriend.

Emily connected her hand with Clara's, "You want to watch horror movies and eat cookie dough ice cream?" she asked.

"You know me so well" Clara laughed and walked off with her best friend.

Destiny knocked on the door of Trisha's house. Noah had been here the whole time with her brother while the dilemma with Oscar went down. She had no idea how she was going to tell Noah her father was dead, but she couldn't keep this from her for any longer, she hated that she would have to leave her here, but she could not handle being here anymore.

Her past was here and she only came back for him, now that he is gone she has nothing left here. Trisha welcomed her and stepped past, letting her in. Noah was watching TV, her little brother beside her playing with his action figures.

"Mommy, " she screamed and jumped into her mother's arms.

"Hi baby, " she smiled, a few tears sticking to her face.

"Hi mom" Ian spoke up walking over to her.

"Hi Ian" she smiled and pulled him into a hug as well.

"Where is Daddy?" Noah asked. Destiny looked up at Trisha for help.

"Um, Noah why don't you and Ian go upstairs for a little, me and your mother need to talk," Trisha said.

"Okay," Noah pouted and grabbed Ian's hand, bringing him upstairs.

"Oh my god I am so sorry Destiny," Trisha said, pulling her into a hug. Destiny broke down in her arms, Eric's absence weighing heavy on her heart.

"I miss him so much Trisha, I can't stay here anymore, I need to leave for a few, this is where I met Eric and I have so much history here, I can't handle it" she sobbed.

"Hey hey, relax, you just need to breathe," Trisha said.

Destiny shook her head, "No, I need to leave now, just let me say goodbye to them" Destiny said breaking the hug.

"How long will you be gone?" Trisha asked her.

"I don't know, but I just know I need to get far away from here, I'll go say goodbye to them," she said turning toward the stairs.

She opened the bedroom door, Noah laid in her bright pink bed with Ian next to her. The two were fast asleep. She placed a kiss on top of each of their foreheads. "I'm so sorry, but I have to do this" she whispered. She brushed the hair out of each of their faces and tucked them in.

She closed the door lightly behind her, tears pouring down her face, she left a piece of herself at the bedroom door, but she needed to do this for herself. She needed to figure who she was before she could even raise them into their own selves.

She hugged Trisha one last time, "Thank you for everything, Trisha you were like the mother I never had," Destiny said.

"You are welcome, I will raise them to be the best they can be, I understand that you need to do this for yourself, at least you said goodbye this time" Trisha joked.

Destiny laughed and let go.

"Goodbye Trisha, tell them that I'm sorry, " she said before opening the door and walking away, leaving her children behind, she hoped they wouldn't hate her for this.

She opened her phone and called Clara, but it went straight to voicemail, she left a message hoping that Clara would understand. She started her car, her bags filled with all that she had in the back, it wasn't very much but it would have to work for now. With little money in her pocket, she was lucky that she could afford a flight to London, she was going to start over completely and try to forget about everything.

While Emily was in the bathroom, Clara checked her phone. She was sitting on her couch, the movie froze on the screen and the only sound is her fireplace. She noticed she had a missed call and a new message from Destiny. She hadn't heard from her sister in a week and she hoped this message would be an apology.

"Clara, I, I'm leaving tonight, I just can't handle being here anymore, this is not where I belong, and since Eric died I'm not myself anymore. Heck, I don't even know who I was in the first place. I need to find myself. I left Noah and Ian with Trisha, I think you should visit them they need their aunt in their lives. Anyway, this is not goodbye, we are family and we will always find a way back to each other, I love you, sis, I'm so sorry, I hope one day you will forgive me for leaving", the message ended there.

Clara was stunned, and angry and at the same time, she could have least said goodbye in person. Clara sighed and threw her phone on the other side of the couch. "What's wrong now?" Emily asked as she entered the living room.

"Destiny, she left" Clara replied.

"What?" Emily yelled, "How could she leave, and with no goodbye, that selfish-"

Clara cut her rant off.

"She said she needed to find herself," she said bluntly.

"Find herself my ass, what about Ian and Noah?" she calmed down.

"She left them to Trisha" Clara said, she didn't know how to act now, her sister had just entered her life again and now she was gone just like that.

"What about my wedding is she coming to that?" Emily asked.

Clara only shrugged, "It feels like everyone important to me is leaving me, first Alex, Eric, then Harry and now Destiny". She broke down and wrapped her arms around herself.

Emily immediately wrapped her arms around her, "Don't leave me too" she cried.

"Never" Emily soothed her.