INTRUDER

MAGGIE (Bonus Chapter)

MOM

You were AMAZING

You were such a GREAT mom to me

You Gave me all you had.

I miss you and I love you.

Rest in HEAVEN.

I miss my mom, words cannot describe how I'm feeling. It's been horrible not having her by my side. I feel empty. Empty in this world. 

This world.... There is just something so horrible about it. There needs to be a change. There are worse people than Garred and they are doing worse things than what Garred did to us. I'm not saying that what Garred did should be "pushed aside", what I am saying is that if you let this type of problem go out of hand it can lead to worse things.

What I did was not right. I know. I will hate myself forever for what I did. My mental illness got the better of me. Look, I get backlash everyday saying I am using mental illness as an excuse to why I did it and that it all is a cover up. Please, do not believe that. The last thing I am trying to do is make myself seem like an angel. No, I did not know what was going on with me and I just lost it. I lost it, and in that wake I left a trail of destruction and despair. I just wanted it to stop. I wanted peace. I wanted my family to be back at where it was. I wanted Garred gone for good. I wanted him dead. 

But that isn't how you control things, regardless of the situation.

Violence solves nothing. Hate solves nothing. 

I am saying this because I have learned. I have grown up. I now know that patience, time, and kindness can make great differences. Instead of showing hate and violence against something you do not like, you should find help. Find someone you can trust and have a talk with them. I beg you to talk to someone, and if you don't feel like you can't, please, please try. You may say you have no friends or no one cares about you. That is not true, there IS someone that cares about you. You just have to look and trust them before it was too late. 

If I would've talked to Ben before any of this happened, I wouldn't be where I am now and my whole life wouldn't have been turned upside down. 

I regret every single minute I did not talk to Ben, he was an angel right in front of me but I never even knew it. Ben could've helped me, I know he would. He never gave up on me, he never did anything for me not to trust him. I was so selfish and ignorant, I wanted to isolate myself and that was the worst decision of my life. Now look at where I am. 

Please don't make the mistake I did, please. Find someone you trust and I am sure they can help you. 

This is me, Claire, April 2015. 

I won't be able to write that much but I will try. 

God, forgive my sins and help everyone who needs someone to talk to and are isolating there pains. Amen.