((COMPLETE!)) What Am I To You? || Namjoon FF

Chapter 28: goodbye love

[Warning: sad asf. If you don't cry you heartless. Joking. Please enjoy this chapter.]

With my heart won't stop beating, I just want my wife to woke up from her sleep, I want her to hold my hand back. I miss seeing her eyesmile. "God, I'm begging. Let me see her smile again." I pray inside. I put my head on the bed, beside chae body, hopefully she will wake up soon.

Chaelin p.o.v
Slowly I open my eyes, the first thing that I saw is, Namjoon. And I can feel it, he hold my hand, he must be so tired. "N-namjoon?" I said and draw a circle on the back of his hand. "Jagi... you awake?" He said. I just nodded. "I miss you. You left me for 15 hours straight" he said. I just smile looking at his "want-to-cry" face. I can see crystal in his eyes. "I'm worried" and he start to cry. Y'all, I swear my heart is breaking at this time, his tears is pure, a man tears. "I'm awake now. It's okay" I cupped his chubby cheek.

Morning
"I made you chicken porridge" he said with a plastic bag in his hand. "You cook this?" I ask. "Of course. Only for you" slowly walking towards me, he put the plastic bag on the table, "are you okay? Feel better?" He ask. I nodded. Actually, as I saw his eyes, he look tired, he sad. I want to cheer him up so bad. I cupped his cheeks, "are you sad?" I ask. He nodded. " I can't see my jagi sick" he said . "Awhh, I love you joon" I poke his nose. "I'm hungry. Lets eat." I said again.

After 2 weeks at hospital, now Im free. Its time to go my own house.

After that dramatic incident, I become more carefully, Namjoon always stay beside me, for making sure I'm safe.

TIME SKIP 2 MONTH
Time flew too fast, our princess is 9 month now. Day by day we waiting, the time is near.

Namjoon sat besides me, "chae....." he spoke and hold my hand. I just hummed. He stop talking, I get worried. "Why?" I ask with soft tone. Suddenly he sigh. "Well, I know you will mad at me if I said this..... but.... I have to" he said. I get confused. "What? Tell me about it." I said. "On your due...... I'm not in Korea *sigh*" he said and his face look so down. I sighed. "Its okay" I said with smile on my face. It was hurts as hell, I'm giving birth but he's not with me. You will feel the same. I want him to be with me, I'm trying to consider with his situation, but I lose my shit. I pull my hand from him, walk to upstairs ready to sleep.

My tears falling down, I was so sensitive these days. Suddenly, I heard someone open the door, and it's Namjoon.

I feel someone hugging me from behind, "I'm sorry" the voice spoke. "I will work for it. I will try to be with you on that day. I promise. Don't cry. Look at me" he said. I turned my body to face him, "I will , okay? Don't cry" he said and wiping my tears away using his thumb.

TIMESKIP DUE DATE
I feel like my stomach want to burst, I shouted Namjoon name. "Namjoon-ah!!! Arghhhhh!" I yelled. Namjoon came towards me, "why?!" He ask with panic. "My...... arghhh" I'm trying to speak but I can't.

We arrive at hospital at 9.45pm , they already put me on the bed, heading to maternity room. I can't stop making straining sounds. Feel like someone just ripped my ovaries. Namjoon hold my hand, trying to calm me down. "Relax, you can do this." "Calm" he keep talking to me.

"Chae... stay strong" he said and I just there crying like mad. "I cantttttt" I said with my tears won't stop falling. "No don't please" he said. "I'm sorry if I couldn't make it" I said. "Okay here we go, you need to strain as much as you can do, control your breathe . Don't move to much" the doctor said. I strain and I can feel the baby head is already came out, "a little bit more" the doctor said. I use all of my energy, I strain as hard as I can, and the whole body is out.

" your baby is out. Congratulation" said the doctor. But I ain't go no energy to smile, my heart beats become fast, I feel something is wrong. I can't breathe well, "I... I... " I said. "Chae? Why? Chae?!" Namjoon shouted. "Nurse! Get me the electric one(lol I don't know what is that shit name)" the doctor shouted. Slowly I closed my eyes, my spirit already leaving my body. "Goodbye love".

Namjoon p.o.v
"Chae? Why? Chae?!" I shouted, my tears falling, is this the end of this?

"Can you wait outside first Kim Namjoon shii?" Ask the doctor. I nodded, walking slowly outside, I sat on one of the waiting-area chairs. "Chae.... please don't leave me and our baby. Please God, help me" I pray with my tears won't stop falling.

"Namjoon-shi?" The doctor called my name with sad face. Please it won't be. Please.

"Yes doctor? How was my wife? She's fine isn't? Please tell me she's fine" I ask nervously. "We're sorry... we couldn't make it. Be strong." The doctor said and slowly sigh. He walk away, not in my vision anymore. "No..... Chae..... we promise.... " my tears falling. I lost my wife. My one and only.

"You can go now" said one of the nurse. I m here, with a bouquet of red roses in my hand, to meet my beautiful wife for the last time. My family, Chae mom, hyuna, and the rest of BTS is here too with me. To meet Chae for the last time. I feel like this is a dream. If this is dream, please wake me up.

I slowly enter the room, I saw her face. She was an angel sent from above. God lend her to me for this 5 years, since we know each other, since we still in secondary school, and i feel thanked.

"My angel, my baby... I'm he-re" I place the roses next to her body, hold her hands and I start to cry. I can't hold it. "I miss you already. Chae, thank you for stand beside me when I'm down, thank you for always making me smile and laugh. Thank you for giving me a baby, which is now her name is Kim JoA, do you remember when we talking what to put as our princess name? I miss those moment with you. *sigh* chaelin ah, those moment with you, I will never forget. Thank you for everything. I'm not good, but you still accept me. my love with you will never be fade. Cause love is not over. I love you till my last breath. I will take care JoA like the way you take care of me. I wish this is just a dream, I want you, yes. I want you to stay with me, take care of JoA together like others do. But, I know, this world just being too cruel to pretty lady like you. You will Forever be missed. I love you my wife" I kissed her forehead. Slowly letting her hands go. Its hard, because after this I can't see her smiling like before. Only memories will stick with me. "I promise to you, I will take care of JoA with all coast. I will make you proud Chae. I will. That is my promise to you. We will meet again in heaven. Wait for me jagiya." I wipe my tears and slowly Walk out from the room.

*I did it!!! Yesss!! For yall information, I cried writing this 😭😭😭💔💔 chaelin already died 💔 I can't stop sobbing. Okay, this chapter is so long, please vote and leave a comment . Hehehe