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Best song ever by my love aka Brendon Urie

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"Oh come on! It will be fun!" Damon tries to persuade me to play 21 questions with him. I'm kinda surprised because I wouldn't have pegged Damon as a game player kinda guy. Hey, but I guess everyone has their secrets. I sigh again and look over at Damon.

"If I do it will you shut the fuck up? You are really annoying me and I'm trying to think of anything but life right now." Damon gives me a side glance and smiles. He can be so childish.

"Yes! I promise." I sign and turn my body towards him. This is really going to be one long ride. But hey, at least we only have about 45 minutes left.

"Ok, you first." I cross my arms and wait for the question to arise.

"Favorite color?" This one is easy.

"Black like my soul. Yours?" Damon glances at me with wide eyes while I keep my straight face on. I mean it is true.

"Well, that took a turn of events. Mine is maroon red. Or navy blue. Either one." I could have guessed that one from his office. I kid you not all the furniture is maroon or brown. It kinda reminds me of The Vampire Diaries or Damon from TVD. Wait. What if Damon is a vampire. Now that, that would amazing.

"Hello? Autumn, are you even listening to me?" Damon waves a hand in front of my face to try and get my attention. I personally don't like when people touch me, nor even get close to me. So this is kinda popping my personal bubble. That has bobbed wire around it. With a sign that says DO NOT POP.

"No sorry what was that? And can you please move your hand out of my face before I break every one of your fingers? Please, and thank you." He rolls his eyes and pulls his hand away to put it back on the steering wheel.

"I asked what was your childhood's best friend. Like you know the one that you grew up with." This question kinda gets my mind all gloomy knowing that I can't remember if I did have a childhood friend.

"I don't know. Haven't known for almost five years. If I did know then I would be with them not here in a car with my boss flying across the country for business during Christmas and not hanging my with my friends and family as any other person would be doing. Who am I kidding? I don't have family nor do I have any friends." I felt something warm and wet slide down my cheek. Knowing that I'm crying, I quickly wipe my tear away and turn so I'm facing out the window.

I couldn't let Damon see this side of me.

My broken side.

I had no family and friends. My parents now are legally my family but it doesn't feel the same. Knowing that your parents are dead and not being able to recall any of it is not something easy to get over. Once knowing you had a life before it all happened, knowing that you had a loving family, loving friends, maybe even a loving boyfriend. It's not easy moving past it like getting over a breakup. Eventually, you will heal, but with this, you can't heal. The past still haunts me, making me wonder if I even do have a purpose now. I lost 16 years of my life. I only have five years of memory now.

It's like being born all over again. You're and newborn wandering the city aimlessly, trying to recall what you are doing and what has happened. But when you try to remember the past your mind just goes poof. Gone. As if it never happened.

"Hey Autumn. What's wrong. Are you all right. Hold on just one second." Damon's voice reels me back into reality. I didn't even know what I was doing. Right now I'm shedding tears with my face in my hands, curled up on the seat. I turn my head around to look at Damon but the tears blur up my vision. I try to stop them from coming out but I can't. It's like trying to close up a dam that has been broken opened.

"Come here." Damon pulls me up, into his lap and strokes my back. With the much-needed comfort, I stuff my face into his shoulder and cry. Crying for me. Crying for my past life. Crying for my parents. And crying for just crying.

"It's alright Autumn. Calm down. You'll hyperventilate if you don't calm down." I steady my breathing and turn my head so I'm looking at Damon's face.

I probably look like a tomato that's been punched in the face from all this crying. Damon leans down and wipes my tears with his thumb. He runs his thumb down my cheek, to my lip then pulls it away. I look up into Damon's eyes and see them clouded with worry and sorrow. But sorrow for what?

"Damon. I-I'm so sorry for putting you through this. And sorry for getting your shirt all wet from my tears." I laugh coldly but cover it up with a half heart smile.

"It's ok. You're ok. I want to help you, Autumn, I really do." He looks at me with so much sorrow that it makes me want to cry again.

"No Damon. I don't know why I cried. I shouldn't have. You probably think I'm a weak little girl in need for a help." I start to mumble but get cut off by Damon's thumb.

"Autumn. It's not good to bottle up your feelings. It's like putting a lid on a pot. Sooner or later it's going to explode from all the pressure that's inside of it. And when it does explode, it gets damaged." Damon's sudden worry for me takes me off guard. I didn't know that my boss would do this for me. Or would pull off the road and sit here, with me on his lap. WAIT, ME ON HIS LAP. I try and wiggle off his lap but his arm around me tightens.

"Autumn no." He says as if I'm a dog. I really don't want to be on his lap because one, my legs are draped around his back, and two, it's very unprofessional of me. But the look in his eyes tells me not to.

"We need to get going. We're going to miss our plane if we don't go right now." I start listing reasons why we need to leave but Damon cuts me off.

"Just shut up already and let me do this." He leans in and closes the gap between us, interlocking our lips.

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Sooo?

Sad? Depressing? Good? Bad?

Mad that I haven't updated in a billion years?

BUT IT PAID OFF.

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Love yall! And Brendon Urie.

-Taylor

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