To Be or Not to Be | hamilton

twenty-six : peggy

Peggy was miserable.

Alexander's downturn had led to a downturn in the chemistry between Peggy and Thomas.

The two seemed to be constantly bickering now, always at the other's throats.

It hurt not only Peggy but also made her mad at the world. She loved Thomas with all of her heart and soul but it became so hard to deal with when she was around him!

She was with Alexander, talking about her current romantic situation even though he was going to be dead in fifteen days. God, that was only two weeks. Why was the world so unfair?!

"I blame myself," he said miserably.

"Why?"

"Will Thomas miss me when I die?"

When. Not if, when. Peggy fought back tears. She knew death was unavoidable, but Alexander always viewed it as an if. "Yes."

"But is he scared? Scared I might die tomorrow?"

Peggy wanted to nod her head once more, but she thought. Thomas held a grudge against Alexander, and he didn't let go of them easily. But would he run one to the grave? "I-I don't know," she whispered after a long silence.

"You and him feel differently about me, Peggy. I think I'm tearing you apart-" Alexander moved, only to wince in pain- "and barely hurting him. It'd cause discourse, which I think you're going through with him right now. Thomas never liked me, but you did. So, it makes sense that when all is said and all is done, you guys would be hurt differently by me and thus be mad at each other for not being in-sync or something, I don't know. But do you blame him for not caring more?"

"Y-you have a point..."

"I know," Alexander grinned. "Get 'im in here. I wanna fix this before I die."

}{

"What, Alexander?"

"Sorry I turned down your drugs," Alexander laughed. Peggy was shocked, stunned, but didn't say anything. She knew Thomas dealt with drugs- hell, he dealt them- to make his income and she supposed that was why the knowledge he tried to sell them to a dying man wasn't surprising to her. "But I'm more sorry I caused fights between you two. Now, let's fix this."

"Alexander told me he was the key reason we're like this," Peggy told her boyfriend before stepping back. "Please don't start a fight again..."

"Why, Alexander?"

"Simple. She's gonna be devastated when I die and you won't be. She- like a lady- is offended you aren't moved to tears by the idea of my demise-"

"I never said I wouldn't cry-"

"Shut up, motherfucker. Anyway, she's mad at you because you don't seem to care that I'm dying in pain of a fucked-up body. Peggy is mad because it doesn't look like you'll care about my death, whereas it will destroy her. She feels like she's going to have to face my death alone, because you won't be there to comfort her. Peggy doesn't feel brave enough to do this- even though she is stronger than she knows- and needs your help, but is scared you won't be there for her when the time comes. Her fear of losing both you and me is so great she can't tell anyone, and it is the cause of the fighting. Simple. Peggy, did I get any of that wrong?"

Peggy could only shake her head slowly, shocked. "N-no."

"Alex-"

"No, Thomas. You know I'm right. We never got alone. I don't fucking care. I could fight you when I was on my last breath and die happy. But your girlfriend cares immensely for me." Peggy saw Alexander tear up, and she had to look away so she didn't cry herself. "And when I die, which is sooner than we all thought, she's gonna be eaten up. You need to be there for her, Thomas."

"I know. But to think-"

"Shut up. Apologise to her. Right now."

"Peggy..." Thomas sighed, taking her hands. Peggy felt a rush of electric love, and she looked up at him. "I am so sorry I made you feel alone. I love you, and I'll always be here for you."

"I accept that apology, mister. Now kiss me."

"Please do," Alexander called from the background. Peggy laughed, her eyes glistening with tears.

And so Thomas did, Alexander clapping in the background.