Hopelessly In Love

Merry F**king Christmas

It's hard to remember something good about a person when the bad things about them are staring you in the face and screaming. Then again, it's hard to acknowledge the bad about a person when the good makes you happier then you have ever been.

It's a maze that most people never figure out how to get out of, and I was no different.

Nathan was that maze, and I was so fucking lost I thought I was never going to find my way out.

Mostly because I didn't want to.

However when bad things start to happen no matter how hard you try to stay oblivious to it all, it's impossible.

Now I wanted nothing more than for him to get out of my life. Everything was easier before him. I was never second guessing myself and I was comfortable. Now I'm just a piece of a broken glass in a pile of broken mirrors.

***

Christmas came much too fast for my liking. The Christmas cheer and happiness was everywhere. And I couldn't fucking escape it. My mother always enjoyed Christmas, she threw a big party and invited the family over. That was until my family had a few problems. My family wasn't so much of a stable family in the first place. So my two sisters having an outing really broke it in two.

So, my mother and I have celebrated Christmas quietly, and alone,  since I was 9.

This year however, was different. My mother planned on visiting family while I stayed with Chontelle for a week. Little did I know that week would turn out horribly.

He was pulling me under... And it was as if I didn't even care.

***

"Merry Christmas!" The Christmas glee is shouted in my face as Steven opens the door.

"Sure seems merry..." A sad smile peaking through.

"Becca!!!" Steph screams as I walk through the door, wiping my feet.

"Hey Steph, how are you?" 

***

This is where I stop.

OKAY OKAY PLEASE READ THIS

I AM NOT GOING TO FINISH WRITING THIS VERSION OF THE BOOK 

Although, I have started to re-write it on my main account- christinafab123556

So if you'd like to find out what happens... I'll be writing it there ;))) 

Okay so from today (1st November 2016) will no longer be using this account for updating or reading. I may check up on it a couple times a month but, if I were really interested in this mess, i'd just check christinafab123556

Here's a little bit about the re-written version of Hopelessly In Love (Rainfall) 

So, Rainfall is not completely based on the true story. I decided to change that since, I realized this was a pretty big part of my life and I just shared it with a bunch of strangers?? It's also showing two POVs annnnd its the really sad side of the story, I kinda tried to keep that out of this version of the book.

Here's the blurb: 

Rainfall

In a swift movement, the earth beneath my feet disappeared. Snatched away by the dark ocean. And I was falling, oh how I was falling. So madly, hopelessly, chaotically in love.

OKAY OKAY OKAY 

Don't roast me yet. It's unlikely to be ANY better than Hopelessly In Love (Although this book is a right mess) so I understand if you're not interested. 

THANK YOU ALL for reading this!! I'm really really sorry, I've been a mess since the early may 2014 and an even bigger mess since the 19/20th of June 2016 and something kinda amazing happened and now its just... fallen through. Don't worry about it.

I hope you all enjoyed my cringe 12yr old writing and now you'll enjoy my cringe 14yr old writing. 

Thank you all, again. I got through a lot of shit because of this piece of writing and everyone who read it. 

I wish you all a long and happy life.