"The Jock and The Nerd always get together." DIRKJAKE HIGHSCHOOL AU

"The Bonding Experiment"

Meenah scoffed, turning to her side-ho, Aranea, with a cheeky smirk.

"Yo, let's say you gimme a good excuse to say why I ain't in lesson while I teach little Dick here why he should join our cool sports team, 'uh Serket?" Peixes spoke in her New Yorker accent.

Aranea nodded, giving her main girl a kiss on the cheek goodbye as she walked along neatly to class. The bell hadn't even rung yet.

Dirk gulped softly, closing his locker with a gentle slam. He faced his bully with a stoic expression, waiting for something to happen.

RING RING RING

There's the bell.

Meenah cracked her neck and fingers, looking Dirk directly in the eyes, or shades rather, as she shooed the rest of her unspoken gang to class.

"Alright, dork. Tell me now why you ain't in the glubbin' sports club or nothin'. I mean, if I do say so myself, you's lookin' fit enough for it." She giggled. "I swear to Gog I will give ya' shell if you don't join. We need anotha' buoy and we don't want Cod damn Cronus on the motherglubbin' team!"

Dirk rolled his eyes, shrugging his shoulders. "Whatever, I have to get to class, so if you'll excuse m-"

"You ain't goin' nowhere you basstard." Meenah placed a hand on his chest, pushing the blonde into his locker as she spoke, she raised her fist, ready to throw a punch at Dirk when someone interrupted.

"Oi! Peixes! I've been lookin' for you! What are you doing to this chap, hm?" A Brit spoke, his accent thick and hella fine. It was Jake English, captain of the sports club, founder in fact. This bitch better bow the fuck down.

"Uhh... Jake. Listen, I was just, y'know, tellin' Dork here that we need him?" Meenah began, not wanting to get in trouble with her boss. "Bass, I don't mean no trouble."

"You were telling him with your fist, 'ey? Tut tut Peixes. You're not gonna be participating after school tonight." Jake laughed, detaching her hand from Dirk's shirt. She was shell shocked.

"But Jake I was tryna do ya' a Cod damn favour!" She growled, storming off to class. "FIN THEN!"
**<I didn't misspell 'fine', it's a pun.>**

Jake rolled his eyes with a snicker, dusting off Dirk's shirt. He smiled at the blonde, while Dirk stared in awe. Forest green eyes, oak brown hair, lightly dusted freckles and the geekiest of glasses...

"Sorry about her, chum. You can tell we've been chasin' ya' tail to get on the team, but you don't have to, I get it's not your thing. The name's-"

"Jake, Jake English. I know, everyone does." Dirk spoke, his tone mildly harsh.

"Gets around I guess."

Dirk shrugged his shoulders, looking down the hallway beside Jake, his eyes widening and his frown growing as he spotted Damara Megido, the school's badass and the most homophobic piece of whore to ever exist. Her high heels clipped and clopped like a god damn horse and she trotted down the hallway like a deer. Her body was a very slender frame mixed with large hips and breasts to uneven it the slightest bit more, she was short and her hair was up in a bun like usual. Her makeup was neat and not overdone, rumour has it she wears a push-up bra for more attention. Her skirt is extremely short and every time the wind blows, you get a flash of her ass. Most admire the view, very few don't. She also doesn't speak very good English.

"You two date? You two homo?" Damara questioned.

Jake shook his head side to side in a Sonic speed, his eyebrows furrowed and a frown painted on his face.

"No, no Damara, we're just discussing manly things."

She nodded, squinting her eyes at Dirk, sniffing his homosexual smell. God dammit.

"Okay, fine. I go. Flash you later."

With that, Damara clip-clopped her stripper heels the fuck out of school to smoke a fag or something. Dirk rolled his eyes.

"How about I take you to class to make up for that shitty situation?" Dirk offered with a smirk.

"Sure."

Around the corner, Roxy swore to herself, squinting at Dirk. She shook her head.

"Ok, what the fuck. Janey and Jake are supposed to be in that situation. Did Jane fucking chicken out, oh my god."

~~~

"Welp, this is my stop. Thanks for the walk, Strider." Jake smirked, looking back at his chum.

Dirk pulled a face. "Sit with me at lunch?" He asked, raising an eyebrow.

Jake hesitated for a second. "Why not?"

Jake grinned and Dirk nodded his head. "Friends?" Dirk questioned.

"Friends," Jake replied as he opened his classroom door. He did his signature 'double pistols and a wink' fuckboy move and said his goodbyes to Dirk as they parted, Strider, of course, getting strange looks from confused people.

This is going to be one hell of a high school life for Dirk.

<Thank you ever so much for reading! If you like this book so far, please do favourite, add to your private and/or public library, and vote for this book; I would appreciate it! Chapters will be released when I'm ready, so please don't bombard me with messages or requests for this and that. Have a nice day!>