Sink or Swim (S.M)

ten

Violet: simon?

Violet: why aren't you replying? are you okay?

Violet: have I done something?

Violet: please talk to me

I ignore all of her messages, the fear of telling her the truth making me feel sick all over again. The boys have barely spoken to me, especially Harry: he hates my guts and I don't blame him. I hate me too. I was drunk and felt like I was twenty one again and just thought it could happen without any consequences. I have broken someone I love.

It's the last day and I dread going home. I drive alone, all of the boys opting to go with anyone else but me. I get it; they love Violet and I hurt her. The drive feels like forever and when I finally turn off of the motorway and on to the streets of London, I realise how close I am to her. 

I realise I'm the first back as I park my car, I slowly get out and walk to the door. I try the handle but see it's locked, I fish my keys out of my pocket and unlock the door, walking in to the find the house eerily empty. 

Simon: where are you

Violet: shopping why

Simon: can you meet me

Violet: okay

Simon: coffee shop?

Violet: I'll be there

I sit in the coffee shop, my leg shaking. It takes her ten minutes to get here, she walks in with one bag in her hand. She's dressed in a pair of black jeans and a white vest, with a black and white checked flannel covering her arms. She smiles when she sees me, but it soon falters when she realises my facial expression. She walks to me.

Violet:

I sit across from him, the tension being noticeable but I have no idea why.

"How was it?" I ask, trying to make conversation.

"Good, yeah-it was good." He nods, his voice low and quiet.

"Simon, just tell me-I don't like when you're like this." I sigh, moving my hand across the table and placing it on his.

He looks down at our hands, before closing his eyes and allowing a tear to escape them. 

"Simon?" I mumble, worried and confused.

"I am so sorry Violet." He whispers.

"I don't understand." I breathe out, the sudden overwhelming feeling of fear setting in.

"I was drunk and it-it was a complete accident and I have no idea how it happened and I-" He beings but I already know what's coming.

"You cheated on me?" I don't quite believe my words as they leave my mouth.

He hides his face with his hands, "I am so fucking sorry and I know that means nothing but fuck-I hate myself for it."

Everything feels frozen. The blood in my body halts in its cycle and my vision becomes blurry. 

"I don't know what to say to you." I admit.

He looks to me, "shout at me, scream at me-tell me I've fucked up and you're gonna leave and I'm never gonna see you again because that's what I deserve isn't it?"

"I think I should go." I whisper, getting up and leaving, before he can stop me. 

I enter the house, knowing the boys are back. I walk up the stairs, to Simon's room. I open the door and suddenly feel like an intruder. Nothing feels like ours anymore; everything is either his or mine. I walk to the bed and sit gently on it, I place my hands on my lap and breathe out. I feel someone in the room and look up to see Harry standing at the door.