Part Time Lovers.

Chapter 15.

"You always knew how to make me feel good. " I said, snuggling closer to my soon to be ex husband. 

"You know I still love you, right Imani?" Nathaniel said in between neck kisses.

"How's the baby doing? How is her father treating you?" Nathaniel asked suddenly. 

It had been blissful, just me and Nathaniel, making love in our home.  No thoughts of Kevin, our divorce, nothing but us. Then reality set in again.

"He told me it wasn't a good time for me to be pregnant.  He kept to thinking about what his baby mama thought." I said, looking away. 

I didn't want him to see me cry, especially not over this, situation.

"Hey, hey now baby girl. Come here. I hate seeing my princess cry. " Nate let me cry on his shoulder.

We stayed like that for awhile, all cuddled up, until I fell asleep.
I didn't know how long I was out, I just kept hearing my phone ring.  I didn't feel like answering it the first 6 times, or even the last time, but someone started banging on my door.  

I quickly threw on my robe, grabbed my phone and answered the door only to see a pissed off Kevin.

"Um, hey. " I stuttered. I  didn't want him to see the marks on my neck and chest from Nathaniel. I hadn't even realized he had pushed his way inside. Or that he had a nasty shiner on his right eye.

"What happened to..."

"I said I don't care about you or the baby, Imani? I only thought about my married baby mama? Huh? Answer me Imani. " Kevin interrupted. 

I don't know what it is about Kevin, but he frightens me sometimes, even though he's never yelled at me. He didn't raise his voice at all, but something about him absolutely terrifies me. 

"Why are you even here? At his house?" Kevin asked, moving closer to me.

I moved back, hitting the wall behind me. 

"Why are you so afraid of me?" Kevin asked gently. 

"You're so afraid of me, that you'd run back and sleep with the man who put you in a hospital. "

When he said that, I snapped.

"So you can sit and worry about your married baby mama, you can do that, but I can't with my husband. Double standards are a bitch." I yelled.

He kissed me, hard and pressed me against the wall.  "You choose, it's either him or me Bella. Him or me. "  He said, putting me back on the ground and walking away. 

"Don't ever say I don't care about my baby.  If that's even my baby. " He murmured, walking out. 

I sat on the sofa and checked my phone. 6 calls from Courtney, 1 from an unknown number.  2 frantic voicemails from  Courtney.

"Imani, call me back.  Nathaniel is extremely angry.  He's screaming at Kevin.  What's going on?"

"Imani, where are you??? Your babies are scared, Nathaniel and Kevin were fighting. Imani what's going on? "

I heard the lock turn, and Nathaniel came in. 

I didn't know who looked worse, him or Kevin.  He had a busted lip and a cut over his eye.

" What happened to..."  Nate just kissed me.  He stopped to lay me in the sofa and untie my robe.

"God, you're perfect. " Nathaniel moaned, before softly kissing my neck, and my chest. 

"We shouldn't be doing this, you know. " He told me, sitting up. 

Way to ruin the mood, Nathaniel. I  tied my robe and sat beside him, laying my head on his chest.

"You ever think we made a mistake 10  years ago?" He asked, running his fingers through my hair.

I thought about it for a while. Did the good times outweigh the bad?

"Sometimes, I think we did. Except for the kids.  We didn't make a mistake then. " I replied.

He nodded. "We were young. Love conquers all, love always wins. "

"Then you started getting drunk and high. " I added.

"You stopped talking to me. " Nate said softly.

"You were beating the shit out of me. All the time." I responded.

"And  you stopped loving me. You just stopped loving me and I needed you, Imani. I still need you. " Nathaniel admitted. "You didn't even want to have another baby with me. It hurt. Still does. "

I hadn't even thought of that. I didn't care how he felt about the baby and I didn't give the abortion a second thought.

" I didn't know if you would hurt the baby. " I explained softly.

"I'd never hurt my babies.  They're my entire world. Why would you ever think that?" Nathaniel actually looked surprised.

"You once said that I was your world. I was your princess, your baby girl. " I said, looking down.

He leaned back into the sofa, and I laid in his lap. 

"Analeigh hates piano, but she thinks it'll make you proud.  Amari thinks if he scores more goals than everyone else on the team, you'll come to a game. " I told him. Nathaniel looked ashamed and disappointed.

"She really doesn't like it? I thought she loved it. "

I shook my head no.

"I haven't been to one of Amari's games this season?"

"You haven't been to one in the past 4 seasons. " I corrected him. He sighed.

"Do you want a divorce?" Nathaniel asked, stroking my hair. 

I didn't know anymore. It was clear Kevin and I were not going to work. I didn't want to be by myself though.  "I don't think I know how to be alone. " I admitted.

"I just want you to be happy, and I don't think I can do that anymore.  I haven't for a long time. Just, please let me see my kids. " He begged.

"I wouldn't keep them from you. You're still their hero. " I said.

We were quiet for a long while, just taking it all in.  I think we both failed to realize our marriage was over long ago. We were strangers under the same roof. No matter how passionate the sex was, the fire was gone from the relationship. 

"I don't think we did. " Nathaniel started.  "We were young, but we were so good together, ya know. I think we probably should've waited a little before having the babies though.     We didn't have time to adjust to being married , Annie came and then Amari.  We never really had time for us. But we didn't make a mistake 10 years ago. " He finished.

I turned over on his lap, I didn't want him to see me cry.  We used to be so in love, we had so many amazing times and fond memories. How did we get here?

"You were always so ambitious, so driven.  You got your degree in like, 3 years.  You went to culinary school and opened a 3 Michelin star restaurant. I started school and it was like I didn't know anything. I couldn't do it, it was so hard and I dropped out. Then you opened another restaurant,and another and then you forgot about me. " I cried. "Then you got that pretty chef from new York and I wasn't good enough for you. I tried so hard to be good enough for you. "

"You're always enough, Kathleen.    Even if I made you feel less than that."  

I drifted into sleep, the baby has been making me so tired.  I woke up a few hours later in my bed with Nathaniel's head by my growing stomach. 

It was perfect.  My little family, and maybe, just maybe, we could make this whole situation work.