Chapter 10

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Sorry for any mistakes, I hope you's enjoy this update!

*Jade's Pov* (Surprise)

Perrie was back in my bed. After months of trying to let her go or draw her back, she was here. There'd been no resistance when I had carried her upstairs, despite showing her the dominance hidden inside of me. I'd taken her again without warning when we reached our bedroom. She did not complain, although I was certain I hurt her that I'd been too rough, too excited after tying her delicate wrists behind her. I needed to explain myself my compulsions before I scared her. She wouldn't be allowed to run away again, but I could not stomach the idea of her fearing me. Running a finger down the soft curve of her hip, I marveled at her presence at the sense of wholeness I only felt when she was near.

But even as we lay here, rediscovering each other now with gentle caresses and stolen kisses, the future weighed on me. Being with me would destroy her. I was a one-women wrecking ball and no matter how much I tried to deny my feelings for her, I couldn't let her go. I couldn't save her. A life with me meant a life of pressure and more scrutiny that any one person should bear. I'd watched it poison my mother, making her into a women I could no longer look to with respect. Everyone around me was forced to live a lie. What would Perrie be forced to endure to be with me?

"Stop it," Perrie demanded in a low voice. "Here and now, remember?"

How did she know what I was thinking? How did she always know?
Because she loved me.

I pushed the thought away, but it was too late. The momentary lightness of the realisation evaporated and my body constricted as though someone was strangling me. Loving me was dangerous. It was the one thing I couldn't prevent. I'd tried to stop her. I'd tried to hurt her.
And here she was.

I wasn't a weak person, but I was powerless to deny myself. My eyes swept over her lips and my member twitched, already ready to fill her again. But I had to show her she was more to me than that. How could I, though, knowing I would inevitably fuck this up?

Reaching out, I gently guided her onto her stomach. The only way to stop the constant onslaught of confusion coursing through me was to give in to my baser instincts. The sight of her ass shapely and inviting did the trick. I couldn't tell her how I felt, because I didn't understand it myself. But I could show her. Lowering my lips to the nape of her neck, I pressed a kiss to her flesh. Perrie released a soft sigh, and the vise-grip around my heart relaxed. This was what I needed to hear the soft moans of her pleasure, to lose myself in the little noises she made as I took her. Her pleasure freed me, giving me a sense of purpose I thought I'd lost forever. Sweeping her hair off her shoulders, I ran my fingers through the loose strands. Another tiny whimper escaped her.

Resisting the urge to plunge inside her so quickly after our last rough encounter, I parted her hair and began to slowly braid it. "I love your hair. I love watching it fall across your face as I fuck you."

"Jade." Caution coloured her voice, as if she was afraid to be pleased by my confession. She wriggled closer to me, pushing her ass against my groin in invitation. "Please, Jade."

My chest constricted again, but this time with pleasure. It was too soon for her body, although I couldn't ignore her plea. "Shh, love. Soon. I'll fuck you soon, but your body needs longer. I took you without making sure you were ready last time. I couldn't help myself."
It wasn't an apology exactly. I couldn't apologise for giving us what we both needed, but now there was no need to rush. I folded a section of her hair over another.

"I'm fine." But her words were forced. She needed the contact as much as I did. Something had happened earlier in the market. Something had spooked her. I wasn't inclined to push her for answers. Not this early in our reconciliation and not after she'd been so angry over my possessiveness. But even if she didn't understand the necessity of my vigilance, she would learn to live with it. I made a mental note to ask Lauren to look into the matter.

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