Idiot Chat ➳ m.c

Carry On

»Ashlee«

"Let the good times roll."

Later that night I found I couldn't sleep. With a kaleidoscope of emotions swirling viciously around my head, sleeping wasn't an option. I had my curtain open so I could see Michael twist and turn in his slumber. With his eyes closed he looked like more of an angel than usual. I found myself staring intently at him as my thoughts wavered. I had given the wrong answer to him, it was a momentary slip of my feelings.

Then I would've kissed you. I groaned at my choice of words. Truth was I wasn't thinking, I just said it without thinking. At this point in time I realised I should just give up trying to hold back my feelings for Michael. I loved him to the point that I knew I wouldn't be able to get over it; ever. As I reminisced all those memories, I remembered kissing Michael. How it was like taking that kaleidoscope and breaking it open to let the glitter free. It would shine and sparkle as the wind blew it away, creating a whirlwind of beauty. Kissing Michael was an exasperating moment that created a sense of freedom afterwards.

Michael shifted again, causing my eyes to wander back to his face. I was surprised to see his eyes wide open, his — usually green — orbs fully black in the darkness. He blinked a few times whilst we looked into one another's eyes. The way his dark lashes fluttered as his blinked was mesmerising. His lips were parted as if he was ready to say something. He began to shake, not like a few hours ago, this wasn't caused by tears but something else. His teeth began to chatter as he wrapped his arms around himself.

I dropped down from my bunk as quietly as I could to avoid waking the sleeping Calum in the bunk underneath me. I grabbed an extra blanket from the closet down the hall and took it back to the chattering Michael. His face lit up when he saw I had brought him back a blanket. I spread it over his duvet, trying not to let my hands linger too long as I smoothed the blanket over his body. I jumped back into my own bunk thinking that would stop him from being cold. The teeth chattering died to a non existent state but his shaking didn't. I knew there were no more blankets down the hall, so I couldn't get him any more.

I watched as he scrunched his eyes shut, trying to stop the shivers. I let out a sharp sigh, trying to think of anything else I could do for him. There was nothing. Except one thing, but that was completely out of the questi- I rolled out from my bunk once more. Pulling his blankets back I jumped up into his bunk. Michael's arms immediately wrapped around me as if I was his personal heat pack. I pulled his blankets back up, wrapping them around us tightly.

His shivering stopped after six minutes. I realised the close proximity soon after. His lips were so close, yet in my mind no matter how much I wanted to press mine to his I couldn't. The longer I stared at his blissful face the less will I had to stop myself. My lips moved on their own, pressing themselves firmly against his cheek. "Better?" I asked as he hugged me tighter.

"Better," he replied drowsily.

I ran my hands over his shoulder blades before snuggling into his chest. I fell asleep easily that night, wrapped in Michael's arms and hearing nothing but the beating of his heart.

x x x

Waking up to an empty bed caused my heart to break a little more. It shouldn't have mattered, it should've been fine. Considering that I wasn't supposed to love him, it shouldn't have hurt me. It was easily midday by the time I decided to get up. I grabbed the tour tee shirt that Calum had left for me and paired it with some ripped shorts. I saw it was sunny outside so I grabbed a cap as well. I could hear the familiar sound of the boy's instruments coming from the venue so I decided to head along there.

The venue was outside, which was a nice change to all the random pubs that they'd played in Sydney. I walked though the car park, getting out my phone to check what was making it vibrate so violently. I never got to seeing what it was as I ran into one member of Blue Forest. It was the shorter one, the one who'd run off when we first met him. Caelan, I think his name was. He was standing in the shade, staring down at the ground with red eyes. As I neared to could see that they were bloodshot and there was wetness just above his upper lip.