Escape

Chapter 5

"I am not ready for this Chad" or "I need some time to think about it" or "I love you but this is a big decision" or Uhhh.... There are a million reactions to my so called 'escape episode' but I chose the worst. Rightly said, You think of the possible answers to a problem when you have been proven wrong. At that time my brain cells died and all I could think was to hide my face somewhere or run away which I did, successfully. He will remember this moment as the most embarrassing moment of his life. I am sad for him. Even after creating a commotion in Chad's today's chapter, I am not feeling anything but sorry for him. I did this to him. Why am I even blaming myself ? What was he thinking when he convinced himself to take that life changing or threatening or whatever decision for himself ? God he was a rebound for me !! He was never meant to be "the Guy", he never was but somehow he fit at that time. Everything started making sense when I met him. My mind then drifted to the earlier phases of my life. The time when it all happened.

It was a February afternoon. It was raining and it was dark unlike the pretty February days. But nothing could beat the amount of darkness my mind was drowned in. I was absorbed in this darkness for over a month now. Relationship with a bad guy is indeed bad. It is self destructive in nature. But girls have a thing for Bad Romance which was responsible for my downfall lately. It all seemed adventurous at first. Late night talks, Doing things that you are not supposed to do, Making fun of the weak , Doing mean things and what not. I saw him as a mentor and as an idol. Because of him, I got my wings and was ready to fly. He armed me with all the evil forces of the nature. Then came Drinking, Drugs, dealing issues, minor thefts and what not. He had a logic behind everything so even if I was doing something really nasty, he would redefine our act with a meaning which will not be so nasty, good actually. For example, this one time He asked me to exchange jackets of a millionaire's son and mine so that i can get his credit cards and money. I was reluctant at first but when he told about how that millionaire's son spend all of his money in gambling and this would teach him a lesson, I was somewhat convinced. I mean I don't know. I can not believe how can anyone fall for these petty stupid schemes but I did fall. A very hard fall indeed. He had a way which was hypnotizing. I wanted more and more and he brought out the worst in me. I was going down with him peacefully before One day I realized that I was the only one going down. I overheard his conversation with some other girl about me being a weak link and 'not fit for the business'. He added that he won't be seeing me anymore and would be interested in doing business with her, with a sly smile. I couldn't take more. I was broken. It was too late to collect the rusty broken pieces of my soul. I was unwell, physically and mentally. I was so down with depression that it was not easy to recover. It was difficult to breathe the air in his apartment. So I ran away. I wanted to cry and shout and then cry again. Under his shadow I never saw my older friends. I had lost touch with everyone. Earlier that week my Boss fired me. According to him I was showing cases of offending language for a month. I was abusive and ill tempered. I could not work because most of the time I was sleep deprived. When he fired me, I did not care. I was happy that I can spend more time with Diem, my partner. So I was a jobless girl with little money and was suffering. I had to do something with my life desperately.

 And Then, as far as I remember, It happened...