A Step in the Other Direction

~~Chapter 12~~

~~Cassidy's Point of View~~

It's seven o'clock one the dot when my alarm goes off. It's Sunday morning, and I can feel the weight trying to keep me in bed. "Not today," I whisper. I swing my feet over my bed, stretching out my arms. Last night wasn't the best sleep I had gotten.

We had left the Harrow house at about one a.m. that morning. And it didn't help that Saturday I had a project to finish. I only got about six hours of sleep that entire day. The rest was spent worrying about Bowen and Saige. I knew Saige was putting on a strong face, but I knew that would soon break. She was too fragile to keep that up.

I went to go and find something nice to wear. It wasn't the first Sunday of the month so I didn't have to work in kids today. I grabbed one of my cute print dresses and a pair of dark boots with a heel in the back. Time to completely lose my balance today!

I laughed at myself as I heard my mom calling from the other side of the house. We always had to be at church by nine o'clock because my mom worked at the information desk and my dad was an usher. People usually started showing up at about 9:30, so I had a good bit of time to spare. I always would walk into the sanctuary and listen to the worship team warm up. It was always a way to clear my head and get ready for the service.

Today when I walked in, there was someone in the seat in front of where my family usually sat. They were dressed in a nicer blue shirt and khakis. The light from the door made them turn and I realized who it was.

"Hey Bowen," I said, worry tracing my words. Should he be out and about right now? Had some miracle happen yesterday and he was all better. I honestly wouldn't be surprised if that was the case.

I guess he picked up my worry, and gave me a reassuring smile, "Hey Cass." I sat down next to him, about to ask how he was. He cut me off. "Yea, I'm fine. I really just needed to get out of that room."

I nodded. His eyes had their old glimmer back in them, and it brought butterflies to my stomach. Why was I doing that? Sorry butterflies, but you have to go. I needed to change the subject quick. "I always love hearing them warm up." I nodded my head towards the singers.

"We used to get here like two hours early and they would just be getting started," he said, eyes slightly glazing over, "I would always go to the balcony and watch the guy work with the sound board. I learned how to use it so when we went down stairs I could help with the media team. Looks like it turned out to be useful." He faintly smiled at the last part.

"Sounds like it was." The conversation ended as the praise team walked down from the stage, going back to where they were going to sit.

Mrs. Kimmy walked over to where her husband and son were sitting. Her older daughter was already downstairs with the youth pastor (there were two youth pastors, one that dealt with newborns to fifth graders and the other middle and high school). I saw her son, Jamie, reaching up to her, wanting to be held. He was only three, but he was my favorite three year old in my class. 

Don't tell him I said that.

She glanced over at me and I waved. Bowen waved at her too, and she began to walk over to us.

We all talked for a minute while I tried to get Jamie to give me a high five.

"Nuh uh!" He said.

"Why not?" I asked innocently.

"I don't want to."

"But why?"

"Because! I don't want to." He turned his back on me and walked over next to his mother. They began to walk to Jamie's classroom and I got up, giving Bowen a nod. He smiled, knowing what I was going to do. I quietly walked up behind Jamie. He didn't see me coming when I grabbed him and wrapped him in a huge hug. "No!!" He pulled out of my grasp, but his eyes showed his excitement. He loved me and he knew it.

Mrs. Kimmy and I laughed and they went to their class. I turned back around, expecting to see the laughing face of Bowen. But that isn't what I saw. The chair that he had just been in was gone, and he was no where in sight. He probably had to do something for his mom. I sat back down where I usually sat, waiting for service to start.

I got bored pretty quick and walked back out, seeing my friend Amber at the door next to my mom. They were chatting about who knows what. I walked over interrupting their conversation. We all talked until my phone clock read 9:55. I walked back into the sanctuary, seeing Mrs. Maggie and Saige sitting where Bowen had been minutes ago. Saige saw me walk in and she got up and gave me a huge hug.

"Hey Cassidy!" She said.

"You're...killing me...Saige," I said as she hugged me tighter. She let go and gave an apologetic smile. "Good morning Saige."

Our conversation was quickly cut off my our Pastor walking up on the stage and beginning the service. 

"Good morning," he said. A almost robotic 'good morning' came back at him. "I know it's Sunday, but come one. Can anyone be excited?" A laugh ran through the crowd, but you could hear how emotionless it was. 

Pastor Marcus jumped right into his message, and I couldn't help but think if he had forgotten worship. He was always forgetting stuff, and he could hardly read some of the names in the scriptures (to be honest most of us couldn't). 

It seemed I was wrong because a few moments later he said, "I know some of you think I forgot praise and worship." He glanced up to the balcony, "I see you Jonathan." There was a laugh from upstairs and then he turned back to the middle part of the Sanctuary. I lost part of his words when the back door opened and small amount of light leaked into the room. I turned my head slightly.

Bowen quickly walked past my chair and sat in the one his mother had saved for him. I could see that his shoulders were hunched, almost like there were a huge weight on them. His back rose and fell in quick breaths. Mrs. Maggie looked ever at him, and her worry was evident. I saw her whisper something in his ear, and he nodded. His mouth moved in an answer, but I couldn't tell what he was saying. He was visibly shaken, and it really scared me.

I saw Mrs. Maggie grab his hand in hers, and it seemed to relax him. He leaned back in his chair just slightly. 

I put my attention back on Pastor Marcus as he was explaining about how we get into a routine in the church. It's always worship, offering, and then the message. Then you get lunch. That was true. "I'm going to change that today. Ushers, please come to the front." My dad and a couple other men (including Mr. Jimmy) grabbed their buckets and walked up to where they always stood when waiting to past the buckets. 

A prayer was said and the ushers gave the bucket to their assigned rows and continued to keep it moving. My mind wandered into the sermon, which was about Jesus doing what people thought was impossible. When they saw him raise Lazarus from the dead, some didn't believe it, and others knew he was the Son of God.

Miracles were something people wished for when life went crazy. I had wished for a miracle once, and I saw the result of what God could do. I still wondered why people wouldn't believe there was a God up there. I mean, couldn't they see it? Were Christians really not showing what they preached?

No, they weren't.