Lessons I learnt from life.

Chapter 14: From my siblings

Lesson I learned from my siblings

Somebody suggested I write on this topic which didn't strike my mind before.  

So moving on to what I learned. I had to think about and notice every detail between me and my siblings. I have two sisters (one elder and one younger) and one brother who is also younger than me.

So the first thing I noticed is our differences. How we are raised by our parents in the same manner and equally still our likes, dislikes, mood, behavior, personality, character, perspective, height,weight, color of the skin, color of the eyes, hair and also our blood group. So different lol but still, despite our differences, together we compute in making of ONE family. How cute is it?

You know, we fight because of our differences but at the end we also love because of our differences because we are a family. Right?

Basically, a 'lesson'  I have learnt or I can give on this topic is when people say,"Blood is thicker than water" that means that family or siblings are better than anyone but in some cases, people have trust issues with strangers because their own blood betrays them and it is reality. It is happening in majority of families now a days. 

So I don't know what do I say to you guys? Do I make you believe that the bond between your siblings and you is special and unique ? or Do I make you caution about the betrayals you can get from them?

WHY NOT BOTH?

So, first things first. It's really important to have siblings, the love and care you get from them. The good golden memories of childhood as well as the universal siblings' fight. Where the elder one always dominates and the younger one rules but the middle one however, gets unnoticed. LOL. You know what I have learnt with this precious relationship I have with my siblings it's that sometimes you gotta be the mature one. Sometimes you have to sacrifice few things. Sometimes you have to compromise being the elder one to the younger sibling and sometimes you have to keep quiet being the younger one to the elder sibling. (I was addressing the middle ones here. I FEEL YOU haha) 

And also the fact that if you are very gullible one in the family or the 'understanding' one, people will always expect you to understand. Like suppose if your sibling tells you to do their work which is assigned to them by your parents but they don't wanna do, so they will choose you and plead you to do their work because they know you won't say no. That's how it works, because you are the soft one, you will always be the one to go through pressure and even this thing can be taken in two perspectives. You have to know when to stop and when it's getting dangerous or else your siblings can keep taking advantage of you and you know, resulting in betrayals. And the other perspective is, if your sibling is grateful for how you are understanding and always helping them then it's no problem. For them, you should even take a bullet through your chest if you had to,(Just saying, if they eat your share of food then definitely not!) because those siblings only, will cry at your funeral and weep for your loss.  And also pray for you. 

The second thing I have to do is to caution you from your own siblings. It kills me to tell you about this. I hope and pray we never get to go through that but, anyway, let me focus on here. 

So I was saying that just like I mentioned above, you need to know when to say NO and when your siblings start taking benefit from you for their own selfish reasons. For example money, when you are young and stuff that's not a problem but when you are adult and working and stuff and supposedly you are earning more than them then this might cause jealousy and then they would start doing anything in their power to try and bring you down. So basically what I think it all depends on the way parents raise their children. You know, from the beginning if the parents treat their children equally then there won't be any complex feelings between one another and no place for jealousy.  Sometimes a few little things could be the cause of jealousy and the worst thing is you never realize how it starts. 

I am not saying you do not trust or not love your siblings. Of course you should! They are your blood and your family and I also know that none other than siblings and family itself would criticize you or underestimate you because, that's how it goes. You know, it's universal. Self esteem starts from your own house and from your own family. 

So in conclusion, family or siblings are the only ones who'll criticize you and they are also the ones who'll be there for you in highs and lows. They might not know of your sadness but they will surely celebrate your happiness. They are times that we have family problems that we can't discuss with anyone no matter how close a friend is to us. But, we can talk about them to our siblings because they know and they are aware of those problems. 

My Islam teacher taught us, and it's engraved on my mind. She said, we should love, but we should love wisely. 

Although it's a single line but if you contemplate on it's deeper meaning you will understand what I am trying to say. Be anything you want but, don't be an emotional fool. 

Until next time,

Take care, 

~Em.