Stand Up (1D - Zayn Malik Fan Fiction)

Eighteen- Little mistakes

I think when I say the suspense is killing me, I mean it- literally. I can feel my stomach churning and I feel as though I’m about to throw up. Everyone is acting as if it’s my fault, whatever ‘it’ is, and Zayn’s now proven my theory wrong, acting as if ‘it’ is his fault. I would really like some answers right now, because my thoughts aren’t answering many of my questions. 

The elevator stopped outside the door to my apartment and Zayn hesitantly ran and opened the door for me. Usually, I would complement his gentleman like qualities and thank him, but right now I felt like chewing my nails off. This was eating me alive. I don’t know how to explain it- was it guilt, or was it suspense, nervousness…
My thoughts were interrupted by Zayn clearing his throat, so I focus on him.

‘So, as you know… something in the news has risen…’ Zayn starts, inhaling deeply. I look up into his chocolate brown eyes, but they aren’t the same as they were this morning. They’re clouded with worry, anger and sadness- yet I didn’t have to look in his eyes to see this, it was written on his face. I felt bad for him, but yet, I just wanted him to be out with it. Zayn seemed to be frozen with whatever he was feeling, because he looked stiff. Just as Zayn was about to say something, Monique walked into the living room, looking down at her phone, holding something.
‘Lily, I snuck out directly after Violet left… I think she’s in the car park…’ she pauses, scrolling through her phone. ‘Here’s the newspaper I got. It’s got him on the front of it.’ She says, emphasising the him. I look up to see a newspaper, with Zayn’s face on the front, and the title ‘Is this Zayn’s lucky girl?’ on the front.

I feel Zayn stiffen even more upon seeing the article. I gaze hard at the magazine, realizing that in the picture of Zayn, there’s another girl holding his hand. And it wasn’t me.
‘Lily?’ Monique grumbles, looking up. Monique gasps, dramatically throwing the newspaper into the kitchen.
‘Yes?’ Lily walks out of the hallway to find Monique across the other side of the room from us, in shock. Her eyes narrow to Zayn who has now gone pale, his face emotionless.
‘Oh, shit.’ Lily says before assessing the situation. She awkwardly smiles and walks back down the hallway, and you can hear the click of her door.
‘What?’ I question Zayn miserably. I feel creases on my forehead start to appear, and Zayn looks down at me. There’s a blank look in his eye, masking the pain. His façade shatters, revealing a worried looking Zayn. I run into the kitchen and before anyone could stop me, I pick up the newspaper, scanning the cover. The Herald Sun did an article of Zayn and another girl, walking in a park, holding hands? I wouldn’t have cared at all if I wasn’t involved with Zayn. But seeing this shattered me.

‘Zayn?’ I squeaked, my voice shattering.
‘…That’s not it, like I told you…’ He says, seeing the hurt on my face. I would try and avoid this by not showing my emotion, but I could physically not hold my hurt back. It was almost too much. I could feel the pricks in my eye, and the tears form. I had no idea what was going on. Whether this whole drama that had escalated was true or not. Could I take his word for it? He seemed unsure.
He started to edge towards me in a comforting fashion, but it wasn’t working. Monique seemed to move forward as well, but I just edged back from them both. Crap, I was being cornered.
I pointed to the girl on the newspaper cover, my lips in a hard, thin line.
‘That’s...’ Zayn started, but I cut him of abruptly.
‘Your other girlfriend? Your sex toy? Your ‘best friend’?’ I snap, feeling the tears suddenly fall down my face. Zayn’s face softened for a minute, but hardened, remembering what I said. Anger grew and I see Monique shoot Zayn a look and he stops.
‘My ex.’ He mutters, looking down. Everything going on right now confuses me. I look back down at the newspaper, scanning the girls face. It was taken in Melbourne, across the other side, because I could recognise the street name.

I looked into Zayn’s eyes, scared and hurt. His ex? He has quite a bit of explaining to do- and I had a feeling Lily and Monique had an idea of what was going on.
‘Ex?’ I gulp, drying the tears from my cheeks.
‘We broke up a few nights before I bumped into you…’ He trailed off, trying not to get into why they broke up. Just for his sake, I decide to avoid the question. Something in my head clicked, and my head snapped downwards.
‘So I’m your… rebound?’ I sniff, my face crumpling up. Before he has time to respond, I duck around him and run for the door. Not stopping to close it behind me, I run into the lift that was thankfully still there and I hit whatever button my finger decides to press. It just so happens I hit 19, the rooftop. It was the floor right above the gym, and most of the time, it was just used for maintenance. You’d think in a crowded building full of children, this level would be off limits- but apparently not.