Following In Your Direction [One Direction: Zayn Malik Romance]

17. Forgive and Forget

               “So, Rose Gates has dropped your tour. What happened that led her to this sudden decision?” The interviewer asked the boys, leaning in as if awaiting a scandalous secret.

                Liam answered, “She was home sick, actually, and wanted to be reunited with her family. We understand completely – it can be really hard to be away on tour, and since this was her first professional experience, we understand there’s a lot of pressure.”

                The interviewer nodded, believing the lie. “And does she still keep in touch with any of you boys? I understand her and Zayn were in a relationship, correct?”

                “It didn’t work out.” Zayn replied dryly.

My heart broke.

                “Well, that’s all the time we have for our show.” The toupee-wearing interviewer said, smiling fakely at the camera. “Thanks for joining us and One Direction! Tune in next week for an exclusive interview with Selena Gomez and Justin Bieber!”

                My bottom lip trembled as I turned the TV off, my eyes staring at the blank screen. The questions were in the air, the boys always lying about how I just wanted to go see my family so they didn’t make me look bad. It was sweet, but unnecessary. I don’t think anyone else can possibly hate me just for knowing them, so they didn’t need to be nice – it would solve absolutely nothing. Suddenly, my phone vibrated from beside me, and I could only guess who it was.

                For the first time in a week, though, I answered Liam’s phone call – he was the only one that I could speak somewhat civilly to. “Hi, Liam.”

                He shuffled around for a moment before answering, “You need to talk to him.”

                “We both know that isn’t a good idea.”

                “No, it’s a good idea alright. The poor lad misses you and blames himself for you leaving – which I haven’t forgiven you for by the way – and he just wants to talk.”

                “Liam…”

                “Please.”

                I don’t know what made me say it, but I said, “Yeah, okay. Put him on the phone.” Maybe it was just because I missed him terribly that I allowed myself to speak to him, but my heart was thudding in anticipation as I heard Liam hand the phone over and said quietly, “Hi.”

                There was a moment of silence in which I thought he had hung up on me before a sad voice answered, “Hi, Rosie.”

                “I, um…” I took a deep breath, shutting my eyes. “I’m sorry.”

                “Why did you go?” He asked, his voice broken and making me want to burst out in tears at that moment.

I didn’t know what to say.

                Had I been wrong all along in thinking this was what was best? I shook my head fiercely. Not only did people begin to turn on me – who was never equipped for this life style anyway – but I was afraid that I was dragging them down. What if people started to ‘boo’ me on stage and the boys thought it was them? And I know it was selfish, but how could I deal going to CD signings and concerts that were meant to be only for One Direction? People didn’t want me there.

                “It’s not for me.” I told him, not completely lying. “This whole life style, it isn’t for me. I’m not outrageously talented nor do I deserve to be touring with a world famous band.”