Charlotte Delaney has sworn off men. After one relationship disaster after another- including turning a guy gay!- Charlotte is so over the male species.
Isaac Fletcher had his heart cruelly broken. Yes, it was years ago. No, he never got over it. I...
The title of this update is also a question for you, the reader, too- do you trust me?
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The last time I accompanied Charlotte to an appointment with her midwife, I dropped the bombshell that I was already a father and perhaps that's why I wasn't as enthusiastic about the scan. See, I'd gone with Alyssa to the early scans when she was expecting Martha but after she told me that I wasn't the father- I stand corrected- after she wrongly told me that I wasn't the father- I didn't go to any more of the ultrasound bookings. I missed out on the important one- the one that would tell us whether the baby would be a boy or girl.
If you thought I was going to miss that appointment this time around, you'd be batshit crazy. Not even the apocalypse would stop me from being there today. I've been telling Charlotte that I don't want to know the sex of the baby but I can see the excitement on her face at the prospect of finding out, so I think I can adjust my stance on this matter. Plus, I really want to know what we're having!
I know you shouldn't have a preference; as long as the baby is healthy and has ten fingers and ten toes, who cares if it's a boy or girl, right? Well, yes, that's partly true. The other part, however, is that I am desperate for the baby to be a girl. There's nothing more precious than holding your daughter for the first time, knowing that you are the first man she is ever going to love and the one that she will always run to whenever she needs a hug.
I don't care about having to spend all day Saturday at ferrying her from dance rehearsal to the pony club as long as I can be part of that. I remember when Martha was really young and it was one of those rare occasions that she was with me and we'd spend all day playing make believe with Princess Tea Party before sitting down to watch Cinderella while Martha would insist on painting my fingernails bright pink. The amount of times I had to explain that one away was way into the tens but I couldn't care less because those moments with my little girl are my most treasured memories. Why wouldn't I want more of those?
Of course, I'd like a boy, too, so that I could teach him everything I know about rugby and cricket and sweeping girls off their feet. It would be like having a ready made best friend and he'd grow up to be a mini me, making his mother's hair go grey prematurely due to all the piss arsing around he'd do. Yes, any son of mine would be a chip off the old block but that's not necessarily a good thing.
No, I think a girl would be just what the doctor ordered. Can you imagine how beautiful she'd be with Charlotte as her mother? How kind she'd be with the Delaney's as her family? How funny she'd be with Martha as her older sister? How well-suited to a convent she;d be with me as her father?
"What are you smiling at?" Charlotte asks as we sit in the waiting room of the hospital. She drops the baby name book into her lap and her nose wrinkled as she studies me. "You look happy. Happier than happy. Your eyes are glazed over. Did you smoke something before coming here?"
I laugh. Wrapping my arms around her shoulder, I pull her closer to me so that I could kiss her forehead. "No, I didn't smoke anything before I came here," I answer with pure amusement in my voice. "I was just thinking, that's all."
