The Storm In Their Hearts - Aching Hearts Series #3

He's got a man-crush

SPOILER ALERT: there's a bit of a crossover with another story of mine here hehe

CHAPTER 33 - HE'S GOT A MAN-CRUSH

REBECCA'S POV

I woke up in the same damp mood as this past week, no surprise, but today things might be a little different, because it's Monday and I have somewhere to go. 

This past week has been infernal, no kidding. I was crushed by sense of guilt, after Al's bitter confession, it was only due. Talk about not seeing a damn elephant under your nose! How could I be so blind?

He was right there, hurting, and I only kept rubbing salt in the wound, with all my repeating how much I cared about him, that I didn't want to lose him, with my selfishness as I asked him to stay, and even with all those sweet ambiguous moments with Will!

Those might not have been officially so, but sure they looked couple-ish, even I could see it, and Maya confirmed it, saying Will and I, ever since I came back from the hospital, have behaved a little bit like lovebirds, for how unintentional that was.

She's right, right then I couldn't see the forest for the freaking trees, but she's right. The way we related, the smiles, the giggles, the intensified bickering, the meaningful looks ... all of that, it was too evidently couple-ish, and only now I can see it.

Al was right there, seeing it all, witnessing all of that while his heart was breaking. I've been such an egoistic brat. I never even stopped, not even for a moment, to consider that Al might be hiding deeper feelings for me.

I simply took for granted that he only wanted me in bed, as much as I wanted him, I took for granted he felt the same friendly yet attracted kind of way towards me as I did towards him, I never suspected he was only concealing his feelings. And I hurt him. Gosh, I hurt him. So fucking much. And he left.

He left because of me, not because he wants to advance in his damn career, he left because he couldn't endure any more of our lovey-dovey bickering, he couldn't endure seeing me and Will so close while he was the third wheel. So now he's gone, and he might not come back at all. All thanks to me.

Way to go, Rebecca, way to go. I was able to split the most perfect brotherly bond ever existed, instead of being D'Artagnan for the Three Musketeers, I was more like Yoko Ono for the Beatles. 

I split them. Invading their lives with my stupidity and selfishness, I ruined their bond, no matter what Byron and Maya say. I was the cause for Al and Will fighting, I was the cause for Al punching his best friend, leaving without a word, and possibly not coming back.

Last week, after that confession, Al left the party once for all, and even though I woke in the early morning purposely to say goodbye, he ignored me and Will, pretended not to have seen us, and simply joined Byron downstairs to head to the airport. He ignored us, implicitly telling us he was done with the both of us.

Needless to say how much that hurt, but what was worse was witnessing Will's devastated look as he took in the message: he was evidently pained, didn't even utter a single word, just went back to his room, didn't speak to me for a couple of days, didn't even show up in my room.

Only on the third day did he finally come back, but things haven't really been the same between us, we don't bicker and laugh the same as we did, he just shows up in my room, brings me lunch, dinner, breakfast, asks how am I doing, then leaves with the excuse of having things to do.

I can understand it. I would have fought it, but honestly, I needed space as much as he did, because if already betraying my late boyfriend put a heavy block on whatever that was between me and Will, hurting a friend only made it worse, and every one of our moments would have felt like rubbing salt in the wound, not caring about the friend we just lost ... it just couldn't be.