So, you love me? - Destiel x reader

Part 17

"Hey guys, are any of you doing anything tomorrow night?" ______ said to the four boys as she walked in the room. The all agreed that they were free for the night.
     "Good, cause I bought all of you tickets to a movie for a double date."
    They all blushed as ______ passed around the tickets. She gave each of them a knowing look and went back to her room.
"That was smooth as shit." Gabe said out loud.

The movie had started an hour ago, and ______ knew it was time. She packed up her bag - filling it with all of her clothing and hunting supplies - and hid pillows under her sheets to make it look like she was still there. She then locked her room, climbed through the window, and disappeared into the trees.
About 45 minutes later, the boys got home. Sam and Gabe went into Sam'a room (to do stuff Dean did not want to think about) and Cas went to go check on ______ while Dean headed to his room.
Cas was surprised to find _____\'s door locked. He was also surprised that when he broke in after various attempts at knocking, her window was unlocked and there was a pile of pillows under her blankets.
Cas burst into Dean's room, oblivious to the dimmed lights and Dean sitting there in his shirt and boxers while sex music played.
"She's gone." He said hurriedly. Dean sat upright from his position of laying on his side.
"_____? Where?" He tugged on his jeans and threw on a jacket.
"I don't know. She's not in he bunker and her window was unlocked. I think she ran away."
"Why?" He rushed over to Sam'a room and threw open the door. Sam and Gabe jumped back from each other. "______ is missing."
"Shit. Since when?" Sam asked, following everyone out to the car.
"I don't know, but we have to find her, now!" Dean slammed the bunker door shut and climbed into his impala. He gunned it down the highway next to the small woods that connected to the bunker. He followed them down an old dirt road that led to an abandoned house made of wooden planks. The paint was peeling and was probably baby blue in its early years. There was a name painted on the mailbox that was now illegible. The windows creaked and groaned with every slight breeze. There was an old swing set in the back yard and a broken hen house. The barn was caved in and most likely a death trap of spiders. The front door to the house was thrown wide open and the boys ran inside.
     "Cas, is she here?" Dean looked frantically through the rooms. Gabe and Sam hurried towards the dining room.
     "I believe she is upstairs." He answered. Everyone ran up the stairs and threw open the bedroom doors. They finally found her in the bathroom, pointing the angel blade to her chest. Her arms were red and bloody, here eyes were bloodshot, and her face was covered in tears. Sam's eyes widened and Dean took his flannel shirt and wrapped it around her arms. Cas took away her blade and Gabe held her in his arms.
     "I want it to stop." She cried. "Let me stop it. Please, let me stop it!" She wrestled against his grasp and he started whispering in her ear. Sam's knees buckled and he leaned against the door frame. Cas wiped the blood off of the angel blade and she sobbed into Gabe's jacket.
      They eventually got her into the car and Sam and Gabe hugged her in the backseat while Dean drove back to the bunker. There, they patched up her arms and got her some hot chocolate. They dried her tears, wrapped a blanket around her shoulders, and sat across from her at a table in the kitchen.
     Sam was the first to speak. "Why?"
     She shrugged and took another sip of her cocoa, avoiding eye contact.
    "_____, please. Tell us why." Cas pleaded.
     "There's nothing to tell." She was now staring at her lap.
     "______." Gabe started. "We just want to help-"
     "HELP ME?" She shouted, pushing her chair over as she stood up. They all went quiets and watched her.
     "Help me like the Davidsons? Like Ms. Cromer? Like the freaking angels? How? How the hell would you fix this? I'm broken all over, that's not really possible, Gabriel. You don't even know what's wrong!"
     She panted, staring back at the boys. Before any of them could do anything, she growled and walked away.

     Sam found ______ sitting alone in the shooting range. Her face was buried in her arms, which rested atop her knees. Sam crouched down next to her and she buried her face deeper. He sighed and went from his squatting position to a seated position where his long legs were stretched in front of him. He laid an arm over her shoulder and pulled her closer.
     "A few years ago, I thought I could close the gates of hell." ______ peeked an eye out at him. He continued staring at the wall across the room. "To do this, I had to complete three trials. I never got to finish them. Dean made me stop because other wise it would have killed me. I didn't want to stop. I wanted to keep going. I didn't care if I lived or died. I just wanted to help save everyone. But you can't. You can't save everyone, but Dean saved me. He wouldn't let me give up fighting. He wouldn't let me give up on living. And we're not letting you give up either." He looked over at ______, who was now showing her face. He wiped a tear off her cheek and she leaned her head on his shoulder. "We want to help you, but we need you to tell us why, ______. We need you to let us help you. Because believe it or not, you're really important. Without you, Dean and Cas wouldn't have happened. Gabe and I wouldn't have happened. We need you here ______. We want you here."
     "After my mom died, I was overly depressed." She finally said. Not meeting Sam's eyes. He listened on. "I spent a lot of nights alone at our house. The one you guys found me in. Afterwards, I found a bunch of temporary homes. They usually kicked me out after a few weeks. Very few of them were hunters, one time I even stayed with Bobby. For like, three days I hid in a dumpster behind Ellen's. Ash found me and kept me at his place for a week or two. I ended up ditching the place." She glanced over at Sam then back at her feet. "In the beginning, I tried to stay longer, but the depression caught up to me. Running seemed to be the only way to escape it, for a while at least. Some people tried to help me, but all they did was send me to mental institutes. Sent me away. They didn't freaking want me, so why should I stay anyways?" No one wanted me." She had started crying again and Sam rubbed circles into her back, letting her sob into his shirt.
Eventually, he was able to get her off of the floor and to the library. When she was in sight of the other three, they all jumped up from the table and enveloped her in a hug. And finally, they were all home.